Do you wonder “how do I get my ex back?” This article will show you five different strategies to get my ex back. These are not strategies that can be done in conjunction with one another. Pick one path and stick to it.
The second path is to be needy. This is not a recommended path. When you are needy, you write lots of love letters, pester them with dozens of texts or emails, and call them at least five times a day. Unless your ex is a real wimp, this will probably turn them off rather than get your ex back.
The alternative to being needy is the second path which is to be available. If you have some hope that your ex will want you back after you have given them a little bit of space, your best strategy is simply to be available. Answer their phone calls and emails, give them a shoulder to cry on, and don’t harass them about getting back together. It’s okay to go on with your life and date other people during this period, but don’t flaunt it in your ex’s face.
If you follow the available path, you’ll just “show up” places where your ex is likely to be hanging out. You’ll find occasional excuses to call your ex (but never more than once every few days).
In this path, you will also send emissaries to him or his friends broaching a reconciliation.
But if you don’t think being available is going to work, you can choose the third path which is to be aggressive – about other people. If you choose the aggressive path, you are going to play on one of mankind’s primal urges, namely jealousy.
This third path could also be called “date your ex’s best friend” because that is one of the strategies on this path.
What you will want to do is make yourself your ex’s dream girl (or guy) and then pursue his friends. When you show up at places he or she hangs out, you will pay lavish attention to your ex’s friends and none whatsoever to him or her.
When you do land a date with your ex’s friend, you should text your ex and ask him what kind of restaurant to make reservations at for your date. Get in your ex’s face with the fact that you are on the market.
As your ex sees that you are a valuable commodity, they will want you back. Jealousy is a powerful human emotion.
Be aware that playing games like this could backfire. If you invest a lot of emotion in “tricking” your ex into wanting you and he or she really is over you, you could hurt yourself badly. Only you can decide whether this strategy is worth the consequences it may cause you.
So, there are three different paths to how to get your ex back.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
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Can Me And My Boyfriend Get Back Together
Many girls want to know, “can me and my boyfriend get back together?” Well, part of the answer to that question depends on you and part depends on your ex boyfriend. This video will look at the things you can do to make it more likely that you and your boyfriend can get back together.
First of all, you need to demonstrate that you have learned from past mistakes. You should look at what didn’t work the first time around and see if you can improve on it. Did he complain that you spent too much time with your girl friends? Then, plan to spend more time with him if you get back together.
The next thing you need to do is remind him of all of the good things in your relationship. Who were you when you first got together? Has anything changed? For instance, when you got together were you a bubbly outgoing girl who had lots of things on your plate? Then, as you got more involved with him, did you drop a lot of your activities? Maybe he dropped you because you weren’t as engaging as you used to be.
Put your hurt feelings aside and look at how you can support your ex boyfriend. While he’s just a friend now, by being there to support him, maybe you can turn the relationship back into something more.
If his friends were critical of you, that may have been the reason behind the break up. Try to win his friends over as they have a great deal of influence on who he chooses to date.
One of the most powerful tools you have to get your ex boyfriend back is to reminisce about the good times you shared. As you put the positive memories in his mind, he will feel more like getting back together with you.
Go to the places you used to go together and do the activities you used to do together. Not only will this make it more likely that you will just “run in” to your ex boyfriend, you will also be developing the hobbies that he enjoys. Also, if there was a pastime that he encouraged you to take up while you were in the relationship, you might want to consider doing it now. It will signal to him that you have changed and have become even more interesting.
Always look your best. You never know when you might run into him. Guys are so much more visual that girls are. So, your appearance matters.
Be a positive person. Guys don’t like depressed, whining girls. Be positive and upbeat around all kinds of people – but especially your ex!
But, whatever you do, don’t be too obvious that you are trying to get your ex boyfriend back. The pressure will make him like you less, not more.
You will notice that the advice I’ve given you here will make you a more attractive girlfriend whether it is for your ex or for a new guy. That’s because improving yourself will always get you a boyfriend.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
First of all, you need to demonstrate that you have learned from past mistakes. You should look at what didn’t work the first time around and see if you can improve on it. Did he complain that you spent too much time with your girl friends? Then, plan to spend more time with him if you get back together.
The next thing you need to do is remind him of all of the good things in your relationship. Who were you when you first got together? Has anything changed? For instance, when you got together were you a bubbly outgoing girl who had lots of things on your plate? Then, as you got more involved with him, did you drop a lot of your activities? Maybe he dropped you because you weren’t as engaging as you used to be.
Put your hurt feelings aside and look at how you can support your ex boyfriend. While he’s just a friend now, by being there to support him, maybe you can turn the relationship back into something more.
If his friends were critical of you, that may have been the reason behind the break up. Try to win his friends over as they have a great deal of influence on who he chooses to date.
One of the most powerful tools you have to get your ex boyfriend back is to reminisce about the good times you shared. As you put the positive memories in his mind, he will feel more like getting back together with you.
Go to the places you used to go together and do the activities you used to do together. Not only will this make it more likely that you will just “run in” to your ex boyfriend, you will also be developing the hobbies that he enjoys. Also, if there was a pastime that he encouraged you to take up while you were in the relationship, you might want to consider doing it now. It will signal to him that you have changed and have become even more interesting.
Always look your best. You never know when you might run into him. Guys are so much more visual that girls are. So, your appearance matters.
Be a positive person. Guys don’t like depressed, whining girls. Be positive and upbeat around all kinds of people – but especially your ex!
But, whatever you do, don’t be too obvious that you are trying to get your ex boyfriend back. The pressure will make him like you less, not more.
You will notice that the advice I’ve given you here will make you a more attractive girlfriend whether it is for your ex or for a new guy. That’s because improving yourself will always get you a boyfriend.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Stop My Divorce
Divorces are at an all time high. Sometimes it seems that it’s easier to get a divorce than to get married.
People get hurt in divorce. The parties are forever scarred. Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt. Knowing this, you may be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”
There are three steps to stopping a divorce.
The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you’ve changed does not mean you really have changed. If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it’s not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.
If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways. It is not enough to tell your partner that you’re not stepping out anymore. You will have to take concrete actions. As an example, you may need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis. If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.
Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship. For instance, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance. If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what. At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life? If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes. But don’t just give lip service to them. Actions speak louder than words.
The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce. Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage. Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument will not win you any points. When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…” this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.
Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument.
You can’t use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind. Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument. If you feel you must win, then you will lose.
Finally, don’t think that you can win an argument. Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they are right and their partner is wrong. This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it’s sure to fail. Instead of arguing, solve the problem. If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
People get hurt in divorce. The parties are forever scarred. Children, if there are any, never get over the hurt. Knowing this, you may be wondering “How do I stop my divorce?”
There are three steps to stopping a divorce.
The first thing that you have to realize is that saying you’ve changed does not mean you really have changed. If you are the person who is at fault in the relationship, it’s not enough to give lip service to the idea of change.
If you have been having affairs, for instance, it is going to take time for your partner to believe that you are no longer going back to your wandering ways. It is not enough to tell your partner that you’re not stepping out anymore. You will have to take concrete actions. As an example, you may need to allow your partner to “monitor” your activities by checking in with him or her on a frequent basis. If your job requires you to travel, you may have to look for a new job that keeps you close to home.
Other things besides affairs can mess up a relationship. For instance, if the wife’s spending habits are causing money problems which weaken the marriage, she may have to commit to cutting up the credit cards and living on a cash allowance. If the husband’s work habits keep him away from home too often, he may have to commit to being home by 6:30 every night no matter what. At the crux of this step is what is the most important thing in your life? If it is your marriage, you will make the necessary changes. But don’t just give lip service to them. Actions speak louder than words.
The next step is to avoid using emotional blackmail if you want to stop your divorce. Recognize that love is NOT enough to save your marriage. Telling your partner, “but I love you” in the heat of an argument will not win you any points. When you say “I love you” at inappropriate times, your partner is forced to say “I love you, BUT…” this weakens the emotional tie that love has between you.
Use the powerful “I love you” message when your wounds are mended, not at the heat of an argument.
You can’t use logic or guilt to change your partner’s mind. Arguing like this will only involve a spiraling argument. If you feel you must win, then you will lose.
Finally, don’t think that you can win an argument. Some people like to use their superior logic or argumentative skills to “prove” they are right and their partner is wrong. This may work in a formally scored debate, but in a marriage (which is scored on emotions not facts) it’s sure to fail. Instead of arguing, solve the problem. If your spouse brings up a fault in you, discuss possible solutions rather than argue back.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
I Lost Love
Are you still holding a candle for your ex, telling your friends and family 'I lost the love of my life'? If that sounds like you then there might still be hope to get your relationship back. There are some things anyone can do to make an ex fall madly in love with you all over again. You really can rekindle that old flame.
The first thing you need to think about is what might have gone wrong. Stop worrying about telling people 'I lost love' and think about what positive steps you can take instead. When you can identify what you think went wrong in the relationship, you're in a good position to begin working on tactics to rectify it and then put some things in place to get your relationship back.
All relationships begin filled with excitement and adrenaline. You both want to please the other person, so you make a big effort to look good and say the right things. You both enjoy each others company, because you're both trying really hard to be enjoyable.
At this point most relationships move into a comfortable phase, where you both feel a little more relaxed. This is the phase where many relationships break up and it can take anywhere from a month to a year to reach this point, and even longer with other people.
Unfortunately, some women misread the signals from their man. They think his comfortable phase means he's pulling away. Most women's first instinct is to try hard to bring him closer again. The usual tactic they try is to cling tighter to him, wanting to see him more often and wanting him to reassure her that he's not leaving.
The reality is men view these tactics as desperation and neediness, which makes them pull away. When their fun-loving, happy girlfriends begin these frantic efforts to cling to them, men feel as though they've lost the girl they fell in love with. Instead, they have a stranger who is making him feel as though he can't do anything right. This is the main reason why men begin to pull away from their girlfriends.
By taking a bit of time out after a break up and working on finding your own confidence again means that you'll realize you have the power to make yourself happy. You can pursue interests that please you or hang out with friends who make you feel good. These activities should also help you to realize that you don't need your ex to make you feel happy. You can do that yourself.
With your new self-confidence and positive attitude, you're in a much better position to call your ex and suggest getting together for a friendly chat over a cup of coffee. Let him see that you've found that happy, confident girl he fell in love with and his feelings will come rushing back. Remember, in the beginning of your relationship, it was the happy, easy going version of you that he fell in love with.
No relationship is perfect and of course you'll have moments where things aren't so perfect, but by making sure you both enjoy the time you spend with each other, you'll be less likely to be telling people 'I lost love' and more likely to tell people 'I found the love of my life'.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
The first thing you need to think about is what might have gone wrong. Stop worrying about telling people 'I lost love' and think about what positive steps you can take instead. When you can identify what you think went wrong in the relationship, you're in a good position to begin working on tactics to rectify it and then put some things in place to get your relationship back.
All relationships begin filled with excitement and adrenaline. You both want to please the other person, so you make a big effort to look good and say the right things. You both enjoy each others company, because you're both trying really hard to be enjoyable.
At this point most relationships move into a comfortable phase, where you both feel a little more relaxed. This is the phase where many relationships break up and it can take anywhere from a month to a year to reach this point, and even longer with other people.
Unfortunately, some women misread the signals from their man. They think his comfortable phase means he's pulling away. Most women's first instinct is to try hard to bring him closer again. The usual tactic they try is to cling tighter to him, wanting to see him more often and wanting him to reassure her that he's not leaving.
The reality is men view these tactics as desperation and neediness, which makes them pull away. When their fun-loving, happy girlfriends begin these frantic efforts to cling to them, men feel as though they've lost the girl they fell in love with. Instead, they have a stranger who is making him feel as though he can't do anything right. This is the main reason why men begin to pull away from their girlfriends.
By taking a bit of time out after a break up and working on finding your own confidence again means that you'll realize you have the power to make yourself happy. You can pursue interests that please you or hang out with friends who make you feel good. These activities should also help you to realize that you don't need your ex to make you feel happy. You can do that yourself.
With your new self-confidence and positive attitude, you're in a much better position to call your ex and suggest getting together for a friendly chat over a cup of coffee. Let him see that you've found that happy, confident girl he fell in love with and his feelings will come rushing back. Remember, in the beginning of your relationship, it was the happy, easy going version of you that he fell in love with.
No relationship is perfect and of course you'll have moments where things aren't so perfect, but by making sure you both enjoy the time you spend with each other, you'll be less likely to be telling people 'I lost love' and more likely to tell people 'I found the love of my life'.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Evaluating Your Relationship With Your Partner - Before You Take Your Relationship To The Next Level
It doesn't matter if you've been in a relationship for a while or if it's brand new, most people will reach a point where they are considering taking their relationship to the next level. The next level could mean anything from physical intimacy to a walk down the aisle. No matter what the next level is for you, now is the time to start evaluating your relationship with your partner.
While it may seem like this would be an easy thing to do it can actually be very difficult. There are a few reasons why achieving an honest evaluation can be a tough thing for people:
1) If you wait too long to honestly access the quality and strength of your relationship you may already be in too deep to be able to objectively analyze the weak points in your partner and your relationship.
Once you've fallen for that person you will see only what you want to see. Few people will still have the strength to honestly admit that there might be a problem. They will turn a blind eye and pretend that everything is great.
2) During the early days and most of the 'dating phase' of a relationship your partner, and you, can be very guarded and careful of what they let the other see. With some people it's a deliberate attempt to hide their true colors with other's it's a more innocent "putting the best foot forward" type of thing.
Either way this tendency can make an honest evaluation very difficult.
One of the most important things you can do to try to have a secure and fulfilling relationship is to honestly evaluate the strength of your partner and the relationship early on.
It's also important to take your time. Too many people ignore the warning signs because they just want to be with someone so badly they are willing to be mis-treated just so they don't have to be alone.
If you really want a strong relationship make sure you are strong first. If you are happy with you and you have made a full life for yourself filled with people and activities that make you happy, then you won't be so desperate for a relationship that you allow yourself to be mis-treated.
Honestly evaluating your relationship with your partner is something everyone should do, but few actually do. The earlier you do it the easier it will be to see things clearly as they really are and not just as you want them to be. That is the difference between a happy and loving relationship and an unhappy and potentially abusive relationship.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
While it may seem like this would be an easy thing to do it can actually be very difficult. There are a few reasons why achieving an honest evaluation can be a tough thing for people:
1) If you wait too long to honestly access the quality and strength of your relationship you may already be in too deep to be able to objectively analyze the weak points in your partner and your relationship.
Once you've fallen for that person you will see only what you want to see. Few people will still have the strength to honestly admit that there might be a problem. They will turn a blind eye and pretend that everything is great.
2) During the early days and most of the 'dating phase' of a relationship your partner, and you, can be very guarded and careful of what they let the other see. With some people it's a deliberate attempt to hide their true colors with other's it's a more innocent "putting the best foot forward" type of thing.
Either way this tendency can make an honest evaluation very difficult.
One of the most important things you can do to try to have a secure and fulfilling relationship is to honestly evaluate the strength of your partner and the relationship early on.
It's also important to take your time. Too many people ignore the warning signs because they just want to be with someone so badly they are willing to be mis-treated just so they don't have to be alone.
If you really want a strong relationship make sure you are strong first. If you are happy with you and you have made a full life for yourself filled with people and activities that make you happy, then you won't be so desperate for a relationship that you allow yourself to be mis-treated.
Honestly evaluating your relationship with your partner is something everyone should do, but few actually do. The earlier you do it the easier it will be to see things clearly as they really are and not just as you want them to be. That is the difference between a happy and loving relationship and an unhappy and potentially abusive relationship.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
What Are The Emotional Stages Of A Relationship Breakup
The emotional roller coaster of a painful breakup generally affects both parties in similar ways. The intensity may be different for the person who wanted the breakup than for the 'dumper', but both people will go through the emotional stages of a relationship breakup.
Knowing and recognizing the different steps for what they are can help you move through the process a little easier. Each stage is necessary so you can heal and be whole and able to find love again some day. Don't try to shortcut the steps, just remember that after you've gone through each step you will be on the road to feeling better.
There is no time limit for how long each step should take to get through. How long it takes will depend on a lot of things such as how secure you are in yourself and what type of a support system you have.
Here are the 5 major steps in a relationship breakup:
1) Pain. This will often hit hard and fast. At first the pain can be diminished somewhat by a feeling of disbelief but once that passes the pain can seem unbearable. This is a physical pain. You might not be able to eat or sleep. Everything seems like too much effort. You just want to crawl into a corner and be left alone.
2) Denial. This is the step when you start thinking that it is all a big mistake and surely your ex will realize it very soon and the two of you will be back together. That can be a dangerous way to think. It is important that you try to move through this stage as quickly as possible. Lingering too long in this stage can really make it harder to heal and move on.
3) Anger. This is when all your fear and hurt turns to anger. You are outraged that someone who claimed to love you could hurt you so deeply. This stage is very destructive and hurtful to both parties and if you're not careful how you handle this stage you might sabotage any chances you have of getting back together.
It's also important to make sure you don't become overly bitter. If you let that bitterness grow too strong it could follow you into other relationships making it harder to ever having a fulfilling relationship again.
4) Grieving. At this stage you will mourn your lost relationship. You will often spend a lot of time reminiscing about all the good times the two of you had shared. It is very important to keep a close watch on your mental health during this stage.
If you ever feel like 'ending it all' make sure you seek help immediately. It is impossible to believe while going through this but you really will love again, if you allow yourself to.
5) Acceptance. You will finally reach a point where you realize it's over. You are stronger and better able to start thinking more about your future and less about your past. This time can be bittersweet: you've realized and dealt with the fact that your relationship is over which is sad, but you're also excited about new opportunities and convinced you will find love again.
The more you know about the emotional stages of a relationship breakup and how to deal with them the easier and quicker you can move on from living in the past to a bright new future. Just make sure you understand that this is all normal and it will get better, just hang in there.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Knowing and recognizing the different steps for what they are can help you move through the process a little easier. Each stage is necessary so you can heal and be whole and able to find love again some day. Don't try to shortcut the steps, just remember that after you've gone through each step you will be on the road to feeling better.
There is no time limit for how long each step should take to get through. How long it takes will depend on a lot of things such as how secure you are in yourself and what type of a support system you have.
Here are the 5 major steps in a relationship breakup:
1) Pain. This will often hit hard and fast. At first the pain can be diminished somewhat by a feeling of disbelief but once that passes the pain can seem unbearable. This is a physical pain. You might not be able to eat or sleep. Everything seems like too much effort. You just want to crawl into a corner and be left alone.
2) Denial. This is the step when you start thinking that it is all a big mistake and surely your ex will realize it very soon and the two of you will be back together. That can be a dangerous way to think. It is important that you try to move through this stage as quickly as possible. Lingering too long in this stage can really make it harder to heal and move on.
3) Anger. This is when all your fear and hurt turns to anger. You are outraged that someone who claimed to love you could hurt you so deeply. This stage is very destructive and hurtful to both parties and if you're not careful how you handle this stage you might sabotage any chances you have of getting back together.
It's also important to make sure you don't become overly bitter. If you let that bitterness grow too strong it could follow you into other relationships making it harder to ever having a fulfilling relationship again.
4) Grieving. At this stage you will mourn your lost relationship. You will often spend a lot of time reminiscing about all the good times the two of you had shared. It is very important to keep a close watch on your mental health during this stage.
If you ever feel like 'ending it all' make sure you seek help immediately. It is impossible to believe while going through this but you really will love again, if you allow yourself to.
5) Acceptance. You will finally reach a point where you realize it's over. You are stronger and better able to start thinking more about your future and less about your past. This time can be bittersweet: you've realized and dealt with the fact that your relationship is over which is sad, but you're also excited about new opportunities and convinced you will find love again.
The more you know about the emotional stages of a relationship breakup and how to deal with them the easier and quicker you can move on from living in the past to a bright new future. Just make sure you understand that this is all normal and it will get better, just hang in there.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Ex Girlfriend Wanting To Get Back - How Do I Do It
It's a classic and tragic story. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy just wants girl back. It's so common that you could place an ad in the local paper: "ex girlfriend wanting to get back, please help."
Even though it happens everyday that doesn't make it any easier when it's you that's going through it. It is still painful and it still sucks.
You don't need to give up though. There are a few things you can do that will make things easier, make you a better man and maybe help you get your ex girlfriend back too.
1) The first thing you want to do is cease and desist all calls, texts, emails, etc. It will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but you have to stop chasing her. Think about it for a minute. When someone is chased what do they do? That's right, they run. You don't want to push her further away from you. Back off and give her some space.
Remember, no one likes a weak, whiny, insecure person. That's just not a turn on. Your ex is no different. Don't cling or you will only push her further away.
2) Have fun. I know that this sounds like ridiculous advice, but it's important. It kind of relates to step 1. Go out with friends and try to live everyday to the fullest. If you can do this you will benefit in a couple of ways.
For one thing she will hear about all the fun you're having and she will start to miss the fun the two of you used to have. She will also remember why she fell in love with you in the first place.
It will also help you to keep your mind off of your ex for a little while. That is a good way to keep from going crazy during this difficult time.
A word of caution though: don't use this step as a pathetic and childish attempt to make her jealous. That is very immature and doesn't work. If you really care about your ex and you want her back you should avoid stupid, destructive and childish games. No good relationship can ever be built on those traits.
3) Try to communicate with her. Don't argue, or badger. Just talk...and listen. This isn't about being right, it's about trying to truly understand where the other person is coming from. This is a time to put your ego on hold.
If you feel like you should place an ad in your local paper that says: "ex girlfriend wanting to get back" than you are pretty serious about getting your ex back. Follow the simple tips I've listed here and you have a much better shot at making that happen. And you can save the money on the ad!
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Even though it happens everyday that doesn't make it any easier when it's you that's going through it. It is still painful and it still sucks.
You don't need to give up though. There are a few things you can do that will make things easier, make you a better man and maybe help you get your ex girlfriend back too.
1) The first thing you want to do is cease and desist all calls, texts, emails, etc. It will be one of the hardest things you've ever done but you have to stop chasing her. Think about it for a minute. When someone is chased what do they do? That's right, they run. You don't want to push her further away from you. Back off and give her some space.
Remember, no one likes a weak, whiny, insecure person. That's just not a turn on. Your ex is no different. Don't cling or you will only push her further away.
2) Have fun. I know that this sounds like ridiculous advice, but it's important. It kind of relates to step 1. Go out with friends and try to live everyday to the fullest. If you can do this you will benefit in a couple of ways.
For one thing she will hear about all the fun you're having and she will start to miss the fun the two of you used to have. She will also remember why she fell in love with you in the first place.
It will also help you to keep your mind off of your ex for a little while. That is a good way to keep from going crazy during this difficult time.
A word of caution though: don't use this step as a pathetic and childish attempt to make her jealous. That is very immature and doesn't work. If you really care about your ex and you want her back you should avoid stupid, destructive and childish games. No good relationship can ever be built on those traits.
3) Try to communicate with her. Don't argue, or badger. Just talk...and listen. This isn't about being right, it's about trying to truly understand where the other person is coming from. This is a time to put your ego on hold.
If you feel like you should place an ad in your local paper that says: "ex girlfriend wanting to get back" than you are pretty serious about getting your ex back. Follow the simple tips I've listed here and you have a much better shot at making that happen. And you can save the money on the ad!
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
I Miss My Ex - What Should I Do
Are you thinking 'I miss my ex' after a painful relationship break up? If this sounds like you, then you're not alone. Missing your ex is a normal part of the grieving process after any break up, but some women's longing to see their ex one more time goes much deeper than simply missing the companionship.
In these cases, women can feel as though they have missed out on their chance at true love. If this sounds like you and you find yourself saying 'I miss my ex' then there may be some things you can do to win back your relationship.
Even if you think you've tried everything you can to get your ex back, perhaps you need to reconsider your tactics, as some of the things you might be doing could potentially be pushing him even further away. Some things women try in order to get their ex to realize how much they miss him can often make him run the other way instead of coming back to you.
These things can include calling him and telling him you miss him and you love him in an upset, miserable tone of voice. To a man, this sounds like desperation from a very unhappy person. Men like to spend time with people who make them feel good. This means they'll look for women who are happy and confident because they make him feel as though he's capable of making them happy.
If you've ever called your ex and cried about how upset you are now he's gone, then you might have pushed him even further away. Don't worry, though. It is possible to fix this kind of mistake by simply not contacting him for a few days to give him plenty of time to miss you. After all, if you're texting or emailing or calling him all the time, when has he had a chance to miss you yet?
While you're spending some time away from him, you need to spend some time working on building up your own self-confidence. Give yourself a mini makeover. When women look good, they feel good too. Spend some time doing things that make you feel good. Go out with some girlfriends and do some fun things together.
Building your own self-confidence will help to stop you thinking about the negative, upsetting aspects of telling yourself over and over 'I miss my ex'. Instead of this, begin thinking about positive things you can do to become the happy, confident woman that your ex fell in love with in the first place.
After all, when you can put yourself back into a positive frame of mind, you'll be ready to give him a call and suggest you both catch up for a friendly coffee and a chat. This will give you a chance to let him spend some time with the happy, confident version of you that he once loved and was attracted to. If you feel your emotions coming to the surface and you feel like you want to beg or plead with him or if you feel like you're going to cry, remember that the unhappy you is the one he pulled away from and broke up with.
So if you're thinking 'I miss my ex', take heart. There is still hope you can work on ways to get your ex back. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
In these cases, women can feel as though they have missed out on their chance at true love. If this sounds like you and you find yourself saying 'I miss my ex' then there may be some things you can do to win back your relationship.
Even if you think you've tried everything you can to get your ex back, perhaps you need to reconsider your tactics, as some of the things you might be doing could potentially be pushing him even further away. Some things women try in order to get their ex to realize how much they miss him can often make him run the other way instead of coming back to you.
These things can include calling him and telling him you miss him and you love him in an upset, miserable tone of voice. To a man, this sounds like desperation from a very unhappy person. Men like to spend time with people who make them feel good. This means they'll look for women who are happy and confident because they make him feel as though he's capable of making them happy.
If you've ever called your ex and cried about how upset you are now he's gone, then you might have pushed him even further away. Don't worry, though. It is possible to fix this kind of mistake by simply not contacting him for a few days to give him plenty of time to miss you. After all, if you're texting or emailing or calling him all the time, when has he had a chance to miss you yet?
While you're spending some time away from him, you need to spend some time working on building up your own self-confidence. Give yourself a mini makeover. When women look good, they feel good too. Spend some time doing things that make you feel good. Go out with some girlfriends and do some fun things together.
Building your own self-confidence will help to stop you thinking about the negative, upsetting aspects of telling yourself over and over 'I miss my ex'. Instead of this, begin thinking about positive things you can do to become the happy, confident woman that your ex fell in love with in the first place.
After all, when you can put yourself back into a positive frame of mind, you'll be ready to give him a call and suggest you both catch up for a friendly coffee and a chat. This will give you a chance to let him spend some time with the happy, confident version of you that he once loved and was attracted to. If you feel your emotions coming to the surface and you feel like you want to beg or plead with him or if you feel like you're going to cry, remember that the unhappy you is the one he pulled away from and broke up with.
So if you're thinking 'I miss my ex', take heart. There is still hope you can work on ways to get your ex back. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Relationship Rescue
Many people begin searching for relationship rescue tactics to try and bring back the spark they once had with a partner when the magic begins to fade. Over time, most relationships grow and change from the loving, romantic bond into a steady routine of daily rituals and habits. In some cases, those habits can make one or both people in the relationship feel as though they're being taken for granted.
Some people may find that they're arguing more often than they're enjoying each other. Others may find that there's nothing left to say to each other or they simply fall into a daily pattern where everything else seems more important than the relationship.
Your relationship doesn't have to be this way.
Often the first avenue many people try in order to re-kindle a relationship is to try and bring back some of the romance. Intimate dinners and provocative lingerie are nice physical attempts at bringing you closer again, but they don't address on the inner, emotional reasons why the relationship may be strained. On the other hand, endlessly talking about your relationship rescue plans and tactics could potentially drive a wedge between you and strain the relationship even further.
There are plenty of relationship rescue tactics you can use to bring that loving spark back into your relationships. Here are some relationship rescue suggestions you can try to help get you back on the right track.
1. Appreciation
When the initial heady, romantic stage of any relationship begins to settle into a comfortable partnership, many people lose sight of the things they originally appreciated in their partner. They begin to focus on the things that irritate them or annoy them or make them mad.
Unfortunately, focusing on all the negative aspects of your partner can often bring about a feeling of resentment, which can lead to arguments and eventually the destruction of the relationship.
It's important to try and find things in your partner that you appreciate. You might appreciate their kindness or their sense of humor or their intelligence or whatever attribute attracted you to them in the first place.
2. Awareness
Live each day of your relationship as though it was the last day you have with your partner. Accidents happen when we least expect them. While this doesn't mean it's going to happen to you, consider how you'd feel if something did happen and today really was the final day you had together.
What would you regret most? What would you wish you'd said or done or changed if you never had the opportunity to do them again?
Your answers to those questions should be the very same things you need to be doing with your partner each and every day. When you live each day as though it was your last, the romance will return almost immediately.
3. Communication
Your partner can't read your mind. Sitting in silence letting a problem brew until you're at bursting point won't make your partner see problems any more clearly and it can compound the negative emotions within you.
It's important to communicate with your partner about your expectations, your needs, your goals and ambitions, your disappointment and anger. Communication is about letting the other person know what you're feeling in a clear, non-blaming manner so that you can both be sure you're on the same page.
Relationship rescue is all about finding ways to be sure you understand and appreciate the little things you do for each other instead of focusing on the negatives. If you can communicate clearly and find ways to appreciate and support your partner, then your relationship rescue attempts will be rewarded.
For more great relationship information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Some people may find that they're arguing more often than they're enjoying each other. Others may find that there's nothing left to say to each other or they simply fall into a daily pattern where everything else seems more important than the relationship.
Your relationship doesn't have to be this way.
Often the first avenue many people try in order to re-kindle a relationship is to try and bring back some of the romance. Intimate dinners and provocative lingerie are nice physical attempts at bringing you closer again, but they don't address on the inner, emotional reasons why the relationship may be strained. On the other hand, endlessly talking about your relationship rescue plans and tactics could potentially drive a wedge between you and strain the relationship even further.
There are plenty of relationship rescue tactics you can use to bring that loving spark back into your relationships. Here are some relationship rescue suggestions you can try to help get you back on the right track.
1. Appreciation
When the initial heady, romantic stage of any relationship begins to settle into a comfortable partnership, many people lose sight of the things they originally appreciated in their partner. They begin to focus on the things that irritate them or annoy them or make them mad.
Unfortunately, focusing on all the negative aspects of your partner can often bring about a feeling of resentment, which can lead to arguments and eventually the destruction of the relationship.
It's important to try and find things in your partner that you appreciate. You might appreciate their kindness or their sense of humor or their intelligence or whatever attribute attracted you to them in the first place.
2. Awareness
Live each day of your relationship as though it was the last day you have with your partner. Accidents happen when we least expect them. While this doesn't mean it's going to happen to you, consider how you'd feel if something did happen and today really was the final day you had together.
What would you regret most? What would you wish you'd said or done or changed if you never had the opportunity to do them again?
Your answers to those questions should be the very same things you need to be doing with your partner each and every day. When you live each day as though it was your last, the romance will return almost immediately.
3. Communication
Your partner can't read your mind. Sitting in silence letting a problem brew until you're at bursting point won't make your partner see problems any more clearly and it can compound the negative emotions within you.
It's important to communicate with your partner about your expectations, your needs, your goals and ambitions, your disappointment and anger. Communication is about letting the other person know what you're feeling in a clear, non-blaming manner so that you can both be sure you're on the same page.
Relationship rescue is all about finding ways to be sure you understand and appreciate the little things you do for each other instead of focusing on the negatives. If you can communicate clearly and find ways to appreciate and support your partner, then your relationship rescue attempts will be rewarded.
For more great relationship information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Saving A Relationship
Saving a relationship might seem like a hopeless task for some women. They worry endlessly that their relationship is falling apart and no matter what they do, their partner seems to be pulling further and further away from them. In an effort to pull their relationship back together, many people try to talk to their partner to find out what's wrong or what could be changed, but unfortunately these tactics can sometimes end up driving your partner even further away.
There are some psychologically proven principles you can put to good use for you when you're saving a relationship. Most relationships move through several phases as they progress. The initial phases of attraction are based on mutual enjoyment of each others company. Your intimacy levels are high and you both want to spend more and more time with each other.
The key to keeping any relationship at the same electrically charged emotional levels they were at when you first met isn't what you'd expect. The key to saving a relationship is attraction.
Many women begin trying to analyze every word their partner has said and the tone of his voice while he said it, trying to find a meaning behind why he's pulling away. They try to make sure they spend even more time with him, insist on knowing or finding out what he's doing when he's not with you or even forcing him to stop acting a certain way in an effort to make the relationship feel more stable.
In reality, these actions are driving you further apart instead of saving a relationship that was once great fun to be a part of. If you're serious about putting your relationship back on track and keeping it that way, then there are some things you'll need to think about.
1. Back to the Beginning
Think about what aspect of you your partner fell in love with when you first met. Most men will say they fell in love with a woman who was fun, happy, bubbly, confident, independent and smart. Many women will say they fell in love with a happy, confident, funny, sensitive guy.
When you first met, you would have been working hard to make sure your partner enjoyed the time he spent in your company. As you became more familiar with each other, you felt secure that you didn't need to work quite so hard. Ask yourself what's changed about each of you since you first met.
2. Attraction
As mentioned before, the key to saving a relationship is attraction. When you're attracted to your partner and he's attracted to you, it's natural you both want to spend more time in each other's company. As you become more familiar with each other, the effort it takes to look good and behave in a fun manner falls away.
Attraction isn't always physically based. Many people are attracted to confidence and independence. Think carefully about what attracted your partner to you originally. This is the key to making your partner fall in love with you all over again.
3. Communication
Effective communication when you're working on saving a relationship doesn't mean sitting down and talking over all the problems in the relationship for hours at a time. In fact, this could break your relationship even further apart.
You need to remember the type of conversations you had when you first met. Most frequently they would have been happy, light-hearted conversations that made you both feel good and made you both enjoy the time you spent together. It's natural for any human on the planet to avoid situations that make them feel bad, so try to find ways to communicate that make you both remember how much you enjoy each other's company.
For more information on saving a relationship, click here.
There are some psychologically proven principles you can put to good use for you when you're saving a relationship. Most relationships move through several phases as they progress. The initial phases of attraction are based on mutual enjoyment of each others company. Your intimacy levels are high and you both want to spend more and more time with each other.
The key to keeping any relationship at the same electrically charged emotional levels they were at when you first met isn't what you'd expect. The key to saving a relationship is attraction.
Many women begin trying to analyze every word their partner has said and the tone of his voice while he said it, trying to find a meaning behind why he's pulling away. They try to make sure they spend even more time with him, insist on knowing or finding out what he's doing when he's not with you or even forcing him to stop acting a certain way in an effort to make the relationship feel more stable.
In reality, these actions are driving you further apart instead of saving a relationship that was once great fun to be a part of. If you're serious about putting your relationship back on track and keeping it that way, then there are some things you'll need to think about.
1. Back to the Beginning
Think about what aspect of you your partner fell in love with when you first met. Most men will say they fell in love with a woman who was fun, happy, bubbly, confident, independent and smart. Many women will say they fell in love with a happy, confident, funny, sensitive guy.
When you first met, you would have been working hard to make sure your partner enjoyed the time he spent in your company. As you became more familiar with each other, you felt secure that you didn't need to work quite so hard. Ask yourself what's changed about each of you since you first met.
2. Attraction
As mentioned before, the key to saving a relationship is attraction. When you're attracted to your partner and he's attracted to you, it's natural you both want to spend more time in each other's company. As you become more familiar with each other, the effort it takes to look good and behave in a fun manner falls away.
Attraction isn't always physically based. Many people are attracted to confidence and independence. Think carefully about what attracted your partner to you originally. This is the key to making your partner fall in love with you all over again.
3. Communication
Effective communication when you're working on saving a relationship doesn't mean sitting down and talking over all the problems in the relationship for hours at a time. In fact, this could break your relationship even further apart.
You need to remember the type of conversations you had when you first met. Most frequently they would have been happy, light-hearted conversations that made you both feel good and made you both enjoy the time you spent together. It's natural for any human on the planet to avoid situations that make them feel bad, so try to find ways to communicate that make you both remember how much you enjoy each other's company.
For more information on saving a relationship, click here.
Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Many people find that once the relationship has broken up, there may still be some signs that your ex wants you back. Sometimes people end relationships for the wrong reasons. This could be because of an argument that led to them saying something they didn't really mean, or it could be because they ended up taking the relationship for granted.
If your relationship has ended and you're wondering if those signals you're receiving are signs your ex wants you back, then there are some things you should think about. There are some men who only want to keep in touch so they can get what they need from you when they want it. However, there are some specific signs that your ex wants you back instead of just wanting to get what he can get.
It's important that you distinguish between real signs and things you hope to see. Some women love their partners so much their imagination helps them to visualize their partner making positive signals to get them back. While it's easy to see the positive in anything he does when you're wanting him back, you must remember that some signals will be him just trying to get whatever he can get from you, while there will be definite clear signals that tell you he really wants to fix the relationship and start over.
Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Perhaps the biggest sign your ex wants you back is when he begins trying to communicate with you frequently. You start to notice you're getting phone calls or text messages and emails more regularly and he seems to want to just keep in touch. This is often a good sign that he wants to test the waters to see if you're still angry or if you're willing to talk.
If you notice during conversations with him that he keeps telling you about things he's doing that are new or different, these could be signs that he's trying to impress you by improving himself. In his mind, he'd be thinking he wasn't good enough to make the relationship work last time, so working to find ways to impress you, such as joining a gym or taking self-help classes or aiming at a new promotion at work or trying to earn more money could be ways for him to try and prove to you that he's a better catch now.
Another way to recognize signs your ex wants you back could be listening carefully to the questions he asks you when you catch up again. If he seems to be very interested in what you're doing and who you spend your time with, then he still has some interest in you. He's testing the waters to be sure you don't have a new guy on the scene.
The biggest possible signs your ex wants you back are unmistakable, yet many women miss them! When he says to you 'I miss you and I want you back', this is an absolutely certain sign he really wants to come back. It's surprising how many men tell their ex-girlfriends this, yet the emotionally worried woman simply doesn't hear it – or worse, she doesn't believe it. She thinks it's a trick or that there's a catch.
The truth is, if he looks you in the eye and tells you he wants to come back, then don't quiz him or accuse him or be doubtful about his signs. Smile. Be the happy, confident person he fell in love with and that he enjoys spending time with. After all, it's the positive signs your ex wants you back that you should be looking for.
For more signs that your ex wants you back, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
If your relationship has ended and you're wondering if those signals you're receiving are signs your ex wants you back, then there are some things you should think about. There are some men who only want to keep in touch so they can get what they need from you when they want it. However, there are some specific signs that your ex wants you back instead of just wanting to get what he can get.
It's important that you distinguish between real signs and things you hope to see. Some women love their partners so much their imagination helps them to visualize their partner making positive signals to get them back. While it's easy to see the positive in anything he does when you're wanting him back, you must remember that some signals will be him just trying to get whatever he can get from you, while there will be definite clear signals that tell you he really wants to fix the relationship and start over.
Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Perhaps the biggest sign your ex wants you back is when he begins trying to communicate with you frequently. You start to notice you're getting phone calls or text messages and emails more regularly and he seems to want to just keep in touch. This is often a good sign that he wants to test the waters to see if you're still angry or if you're willing to talk.
If you notice during conversations with him that he keeps telling you about things he's doing that are new or different, these could be signs that he's trying to impress you by improving himself. In his mind, he'd be thinking he wasn't good enough to make the relationship work last time, so working to find ways to impress you, such as joining a gym or taking self-help classes or aiming at a new promotion at work or trying to earn more money could be ways for him to try and prove to you that he's a better catch now.
Another way to recognize signs your ex wants you back could be listening carefully to the questions he asks you when you catch up again. If he seems to be very interested in what you're doing and who you spend your time with, then he still has some interest in you. He's testing the waters to be sure you don't have a new guy on the scene.
The biggest possible signs your ex wants you back are unmistakable, yet many women miss them! When he says to you 'I miss you and I want you back', this is an absolutely certain sign he really wants to come back. It's surprising how many men tell their ex-girlfriends this, yet the emotionally worried woman simply doesn't hear it – or worse, she doesn't believe it. She thinks it's a trick or that there's a catch.
The truth is, if he looks you in the eye and tells you he wants to come back, then don't quiz him or accuse him or be doubtful about his signs. Smile. Be the happy, confident person he fell in love with and that he enjoys spending time with. After all, it's the positive signs your ex wants you back that you should be looking for.
For more signs that your ex wants you back, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Relationship Self Help Can Save Your Relationship
There are plenty of relationship self help techniques you can use to bring the intimacy back into your relationship. Many people begin to feel that the intimacy levels in their relationships begin to fade over time. They mistakenly believe this means the love is gone, but the truth is that all relationships develop into a pattern of habits and rituals that can often make people feel more like roommates than lovers.
Instead of giving up on your relationship, try using some relationship self help techniques to bring the intimacy levels back to where they were when you first met.
1. Small Talk
Research has shown that couples who engage in regular small talk will experience less arguments and fights throughout their relationship. Connective small talk doesn't mean bombarding your partner with an hour-long diatribe about every single thing you did during the day.
Small talk is simply sharing opinions or observations from things you did through your day. It also means learning to avoid mono-syllable responses and actually showing a bit of interest in what each other is saying. Ask questions and respond to your partner with positivity.
2. Eye Contact
How many times do you really look your partner in the eye when you talk together? As relationships progress, many people tend to look in the direction of their partner's eyes, but they don't make eye contact.
When you first met, eye contact would have been high. Humans react to eye contact as being a positive way to build intimacy. As you become more familiar with each other, this decreases over time, which also leads people to believe the intimacy is dying.
3. Non-sexual Physical Contact
Learning to touch your partner and encouraging them to touch you too in non-sexual ways can help to increase intimacy. Give your partner a hug without expecting it to lead to anything further. Offer your partner a back massage or a foot rub and don't have an ulterior motive. Hold hands when you're out together. These simple forms of physical contact re-establish a level of intimacy and trust in each other that can be very effective relationship self help techniques.
4. Appreciation
Instead of focusing on the things that annoy you about your partner, try focusing on the things you appreciate about them instead. There must be things about your partner that attracted you to them originally, so spend some time each day focusing on the positive things and don't waste time concentrating on the annoying traits that everyone has anyway.
5. Time Out
Far too many couples fall into a pattern of trying to spend all of their time with their partner. They begin to feel as though their partner is somehow deserting them if they want to spend a little time doing something without their significant other. While it's normal to enjoy each other's company, it's also important to remember that everyone needs a little time out occasionally.
This could be something as simple as going out for a meal or a movie with friends or a coffee with the girls. Research shows that many couples improve their relationships when they display trust and encourage each other to spend a little time doing things they enjoy.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Instead of giving up on your relationship, try using some relationship self help techniques to bring the intimacy levels back to where they were when you first met.
1. Small Talk
Research has shown that couples who engage in regular small talk will experience less arguments and fights throughout their relationship. Connective small talk doesn't mean bombarding your partner with an hour-long diatribe about every single thing you did during the day.
Small talk is simply sharing opinions or observations from things you did through your day. It also means learning to avoid mono-syllable responses and actually showing a bit of interest in what each other is saying. Ask questions and respond to your partner with positivity.
2. Eye Contact
How many times do you really look your partner in the eye when you talk together? As relationships progress, many people tend to look in the direction of their partner's eyes, but they don't make eye contact.
When you first met, eye contact would have been high. Humans react to eye contact as being a positive way to build intimacy. As you become more familiar with each other, this decreases over time, which also leads people to believe the intimacy is dying.
3. Non-sexual Physical Contact
Learning to touch your partner and encouraging them to touch you too in non-sexual ways can help to increase intimacy. Give your partner a hug without expecting it to lead to anything further. Offer your partner a back massage or a foot rub and don't have an ulterior motive. Hold hands when you're out together. These simple forms of physical contact re-establish a level of intimacy and trust in each other that can be very effective relationship self help techniques.
4. Appreciation
Instead of focusing on the things that annoy you about your partner, try focusing on the things you appreciate about them instead. There must be things about your partner that attracted you to them originally, so spend some time each day focusing on the positive things and don't waste time concentrating on the annoying traits that everyone has anyway.
5. Time Out
Far too many couples fall into a pattern of trying to spend all of their time with their partner. They begin to feel as though their partner is somehow deserting them if they want to spend a little time doing something without their significant other. While it's normal to enjoy each other's company, it's also important to remember that everyone needs a little time out occasionally.
This could be something as simple as going out for a meal or a movie with friends or a coffee with the girls. Research shows that many couples improve their relationships when they display trust and encourage each other to spend a little time doing things they enjoy.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Get Back With Your Ex
Are you thinking about ways how to get back with ex? Almost every adult on the planet has gone through a relationship break up at some point in their lives. Most of the time people simply move through the hurt and try to move on.
What these people don't realize is that around 90% of all relationship break ups could have been stopped and if they've already happened, then they can be reversed.
The first step in learning how to get back with your ex is to look objectively at why the break up happened. You won't be able to change the reasons why you broke up, but you should be objective enough to realize that it takes two. This means accepting responsibility for your part in the relationship, understanding what mistakes you might have made and learning from them.
Try to think about what specific attributes attracted your ex to you when you first met. This doesn't necessarily mean your looks. It means ask yourself what did you do back then that made him so happy to spend plenty of time in your company?
Compare this to the time you spent together just before the break up. Was he becoming distant, which made you want to hang onto him even tighter? Was he pulling away, which made you try hard to let him know how much you loved him? Perhaps you spent plenty of time analyzing the relationship in an effort to fix it before the break up happened.
Each of these things spells 'needy' to a male, yet the biggest thing that attracts most men to their partners is a happy, confident girl that makes them feel good to be around. Neediness can often push a man away from even the best relationship.
Work hard on regaining your confidence and your happiness. Remember, these are the things your ex fell in love with in the first place, and they're the same things that can make your ex fall in love with you all over again.
Men and women communicate very differently to each other. When a woman is trying to find out how to get back with her ex, she will attempt to get her ex to talk about what went wrong. She wants to analyze and fix whatever was broken in the relationship.
Men won't view this as a sign that it should be fixed or that you should get back together. They simply view it as being too needy and they will begin wondering how to find someone who makes their time spent together happy and fun again.
The next big positive step you can take to get back with your ex is to arrange to meet for a chat about the possibility of remaining in touch with each other. Don't be surprised if he's initially a little hesitant. After all, he'll be remembering only the reasons you broke up.
He'll need some gentle reminding about all the reasons he fell in love with you in order to make him realize you were one of the best things that had happened to him. Your gentle reminders should be to show him that you're happy and confident again, just like you were when he fell in love with you the first time. You shouldn't be yelling at him or blaming or accusing and you shouldn't be telling him all the good things you did. These things don't work. Simply allow him to see the happy, confident, independent person that swept him off his feet and his feelings will begin to re-emerge all on their own. Then you'll have a strong foundation for how to get back with your ex.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
What these people don't realize is that around 90% of all relationship break ups could have been stopped and if they've already happened, then they can be reversed.
The first step in learning how to get back with your ex is to look objectively at why the break up happened. You won't be able to change the reasons why you broke up, but you should be objective enough to realize that it takes two. This means accepting responsibility for your part in the relationship, understanding what mistakes you might have made and learning from them.
Try to think about what specific attributes attracted your ex to you when you first met. This doesn't necessarily mean your looks. It means ask yourself what did you do back then that made him so happy to spend plenty of time in your company?
Compare this to the time you spent together just before the break up. Was he becoming distant, which made you want to hang onto him even tighter? Was he pulling away, which made you try hard to let him know how much you loved him? Perhaps you spent plenty of time analyzing the relationship in an effort to fix it before the break up happened.
Each of these things spells 'needy' to a male, yet the biggest thing that attracts most men to their partners is a happy, confident girl that makes them feel good to be around. Neediness can often push a man away from even the best relationship.
Work hard on regaining your confidence and your happiness. Remember, these are the things your ex fell in love with in the first place, and they're the same things that can make your ex fall in love with you all over again.
Men and women communicate very differently to each other. When a woman is trying to find out how to get back with her ex, she will attempt to get her ex to talk about what went wrong. She wants to analyze and fix whatever was broken in the relationship.
Men won't view this as a sign that it should be fixed or that you should get back together. They simply view it as being too needy and they will begin wondering how to find someone who makes their time spent together happy and fun again.
The next big positive step you can take to get back with your ex is to arrange to meet for a chat about the possibility of remaining in touch with each other. Don't be surprised if he's initially a little hesitant. After all, he'll be remembering only the reasons you broke up.
He'll need some gentle reminding about all the reasons he fell in love with you in order to make him realize you were one of the best things that had happened to him. Your gentle reminders should be to show him that you're happy and confident again, just like you were when he fell in love with you the first time. You shouldn't be yelling at him or blaming or accusing and you shouldn't be telling him all the good things you did. These things don't work. Simply allow him to see the happy, confident, independent person that swept him off his feet and his feelings will begin to re-emerge all on their own. Then you'll have a strong foundation for how to get back with your ex.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Stop A Divorce
Are you worried that you might not be able to find ways how to stop a divorce? If you're like most people, you would have tried everything you can think of in an effort to keep your relationship and stop it from falling apart.
Unfortunately, if you're also like most people, some of those things you've been doing to try and figure out how to stop a divorce are actually pushing your partner further away.
Here are some of the things most people do when they think they know how to stop a divorce.
1. Reassurance
Most people try hard to tell their partner that they'll change. They reassure them that if they stay in the relationship, things will be different. If you've been pleading with your partner to stay and reassuring him that everything will be better, then you could be pushing him further away.
2. Desperation
The majority of women trying to stop a divorce tell their partner over and over again 'I love you'. They want him to see how much they care in the hope that it will make him stay. Trying to make your partner understand how much you love him and how much you need him is almost certain to make him want to pull away. After all, if you keep telling him that you can't live without him and he's the only one who can make you happy, then he's seeing that act of desperation as coming from a person who no longer has the confidence of the woman he originally fell in love with.
3. Talking
Many women spend endless hours talking, arguing, reasoning, analyzing and trying to fix a failing relationship. This tactic never works. In fact, it simply reinforces to a man that the relationship must be in serious trouble if it requires this much arguing and analyzing, so why keep trying? Nobody wants to be married to someone who constantly wants to focus on the negative aspects of everything that's going on.
While these things are almost normal instinctive behaviors for many women, they don't actually work when it comes to finding ways how to stop a divorce. What works is taking a step back and looking at your relationship a little differently. It's time to remove the emotion for just a moment and work on the dynamics of how you and your partner connected in the first place.
Think about when you first met. You would both have been happy and confident and cheerful. It was just fun to be in each others company. You would have been quite happy to accept your partner for who he was and you would have both made an effort to be sure to compromise on some things so you were both happy. Your partner would have fallen madly in love with you because you made him feel happy when you were together.
In order to find a real way how to stop a divorce, you need to figure out how to get back that happy, confident woman your husband fell in love with originally. This is not the same thing as getting a make-over. Your physical appearance isn't going to change a person's emotions. You'll need to stop focusing on the negative aspects of what's going on and work on your own inner happiness. When you're happy and confident on the inside, you suddenly become more like the person your partner loves and respects. That's the woman he enjoys spending time with and that will also be the woman he will stop pulling away from.
When you can raise your confidence levels to that point and avoid all the usual triggers that push men away, you will have learned the easiest way of how to stop a divorce. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Unfortunately, if you're also like most people, some of those things you've been doing to try and figure out how to stop a divorce are actually pushing your partner further away.
Here are some of the things most people do when they think they know how to stop a divorce.
1. Reassurance
Most people try hard to tell their partner that they'll change. They reassure them that if they stay in the relationship, things will be different. If you've been pleading with your partner to stay and reassuring him that everything will be better, then you could be pushing him further away.
2. Desperation
The majority of women trying to stop a divorce tell their partner over and over again 'I love you'. They want him to see how much they care in the hope that it will make him stay. Trying to make your partner understand how much you love him and how much you need him is almost certain to make him want to pull away. After all, if you keep telling him that you can't live without him and he's the only one who can make you happy, then he's seeing that act of desperation as coming from a person who no longer has the confidence of the woman he originally fell in love with.
3. Talking
Many women spend endless hours talking, arguing, reasoning, analyzing and trying to fix a failing relationship. This tactic never works. In fact, it simply reinforces to a man that the relationship must be in serious trouble if it requires this much arguing and analyzing, so why keep trying? Nobody wants to be married to someone who constantly wants to focus on the negative aspects of everything that's going on.
While these things are almost normal instinctive behaviors for many women, they don't actually work when it comes to finding ways how to stop a divorce. What works is taking a step back and looking at your relationship a little differently. It's time to remove the emotion for just a moment and work on the dynamics of how you and your partner connected in the first place.
Think about when you first met. You would both have been happy and confident and cheerful. It was just fun to be in each others company. You would have been quite happy to accept your partner for who he was and you would have both made an effort to be sure to compromise on some things so you were both happy. Your partner would have fallen madly in love with you because you made him feel happy when you were together.
In order to find a real way how to stop a divorce, you need to figure out how to get back that happy, confident woman your husband fell in love with originally. This is not the same thing as getting a make-over. Your physical appearance isn't going to change a person's emotions. You'll need to stop focusing on the negative aspects of what's going on and work on your own inner happiness. When you're happy and confident on the inside, you suddenly become more like the person your partner loves and respects. That's the woman he enjoys spending time with and that will also be the woman he will stop pulling away from.
When you can raise your confidence levels to that point and avoid all the usual triggers that push men away, you will have learned the easiest way of how to stop a divorce. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Win Love Back
It's easy to fall into routines and habits in relationships where we all end up taking what we have for granted. We simply expect the other person to be there until one day the relationship comes crumbling down around you. Fortunately learning how to win love back is easier than most people believe.
The problem with most 'how to win love back' tactics is that they don't take into consideration the primary differences between the way men and women think. Women will try very hard to make their man understand how much they love him and need him, while men view actions as speaking louder than any words you can say.
If you're serious about learning how to win love back, then you'll need to spend a bit of time removing the words from your relationship's memories and taking a look at what your actions were saying.
Most women can think of times when they were trying hard to tell their man that they love him and want him to stay. You know the words you said, but what did your actions say? To a man, you would have been showing him how upset you were and how hurt you were. In his mind, he would have been thinking that he's the cause of all your misery, so you'd be better off if he just broke up with you. This means all your reassurances of how much you love him actually pushed him away!
Think about all the times where you both argued and got angry. Your words might have been trying to make him see reason and understand your point of view, but your actions were telling him something very different. Your man wouldn't have heard the words you shouted at him. He would only have seen a very unhappy woman who really wasn't happy with the man before her. His mind would instantly have thought he was the cause of your misery and he's believe it's easier to break up with you rather than keep making you so unhappy. The same thing is true if you give him the silent treatment.
When you're learning how to win back love, you have to realize that your actions will speak far louder than any words you can say. Your partner wants you to be happy. He also wants to believe you're happy when you're spending time with him. The best possible way to show him that he's the right man for you is to go out and work on your own self-confidence levels.
When you feel happy within yourself and you're confident and brimming with life, you're irresistible to the man who fell in love with you. After all, when the relationship was still new and exciting, you were both bubbly and happy and pleased to spend time with each other. This is the version of you your partner fell in love with.
Spend some time working on things that make you happy. Hang out with friends or take a walk to clear your unhappy thoughts. Watch a fun movie and then suggest that you catch up with your man over a friendly cup of coffee. Your actions will show that you're a more pleasant person to be with and his feelings will start to re-kindle as though by magic.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
The problem with most 'how to win love back' tactics is that they don't take into consideration the primary differences between the way men and women think. Women will try very hard to make their man understand how much they love him and need him, while men view actions as speaking louder than any words you can say.
If you're serious about learning how to win love back, then you'll need to spend a bit of time removing the words from your relationship's memories and taking a look at what your actions were saying.
Most women can think of times when they were trying hard to tell their man that they love him and want him to stay. You know the words you said, but what did your actions say? To a man, you would have been showing him how upset you were and how hurt you were. In his mind, he would have been thinking that he's the cause of all your misery, so you'd be better off if he just broke up with you. This means all your reassurances of how much you love him actually pushed him away!
Think about all the times where you both argued and got angry. Your words might have been trying to make him see reason and understand your point of view, but your actions were telling him something very different. Your man wouldn't have heard the words you shouted at him. He would only have seen a very unhappy woman who really wasn't happy with the man before her. His mind would instantly have thought he was the cause of your misery and he's believe it's easier to break up with you rather than keep making you so unhappy. The same thing is true if you give him the silent treatment.
When you're learning how to win back love, you have to realize that your actions will speak far louder than any words you can say. Your partner wants you to be happy. He also wants to believe you're happy when you're spending time with him. The best possible way to show him that he's the right man for you is to go out and work on your own self-confidence levels.
When you feel happy within yourself and you're confident and brimming with life, you're irresistible to the man who fell in love with you. After all, when the relationship was still new and exciting, you were both bubbly and happy and pleased to spend time with each other. This is the version of you your partner fell in love with.
Spend some time working on things that make you happy. Hang out with friends or take a walk to clear your unhappy thoughts. Watch a fun movie and then suggest that you catch up with your man over a friendly cup of coffee. Your actions will show that you're a more pleasant person to be with and his feelings will start to re-kindle as though by magic.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Still In Love With My Ex Girlfriend - How To Get Her Back
Many men tell me 'I'm still in love with my ex girlfriend.' They want to know if there's anything they can do to get her back. The very first question to ask men who think they want their ex back is to ask what they've already tried.
A man who is serious about getting his ex girlfriend back will usually say he's repeatedly tried to tell her how much he loves her and needs her. He's reassured her that he'll change and the relationship will be different if she gives him a second chance. This kind of begging and pleading simply shows a woman that you're desperate and often drives them even further away.
Some men will try the opposite tactic to pleading and they'll turn to bribery. Buying her expensive gifts or taking her to fancy restaurants in an attempt to impress her won't work either. She may accept your tokens, but bribery isn't the way to win back love.
The vast majority of women want to be in a relationship with a man who will listen to what she has to say. Even if she's just making small talk, it's important to her that she's heard. This doesn't mean you have to agree with everything she says. You just need to listen.
When asked if they're willing to listen to their ex girlfriends, men who are trying hard to get back their ex often say 'I've tried to listen, but she doesn't listen to a word I say.' Sometimes when men think they're listening, what they're really doing is hearing the problem and then immediately talking back to offer a solution to fix whatever problem his girlfriend is having. He believes because she doesn't hear a word he says that she's not listening.
However, only hearing the parts of the conversation you think you can help her with and then trying to make her listen to you first is not the same as YOU listening to your girlfriend's needs. Women appreciate men who listen to them. Unfortunately, men communicate in slightly different ways, which could probably have been a contributing factor to your break up in the first place.
If you're still thinking 'I'm still in love with my ex-girlfriend and want to get her back', then practice listening. Ask her a question and then listen to what she says intently. Make a comment about her response or ask another question relating to her response, but don't try to fix it or dismiss it as unimportant. Simply listen to her.
Women assume that a man who listens to her really cares. It tells you that you understand and that you're really interested. The next time you receive an opportunity to get together with your ex, take some time to establish eye contact and really listen intently to what she says.
At first, you might find your ex-girlfriend is a little confused or guarded about your sudden change, but when she realizes that you are interested in what she's saying she'll begin to relax and realize that you do care. She'll immediately begin wondering why her feelings for you went away and they should come rushing back when she understands that you really do still love your ex and really do want her back.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
A man who is serious about getting his ex girlfriend back will usually say he's repeatedly tried to tell her how much he loves her and needs her. He's reassured her that he'll change and the relationship will be different if she gives him a second chance. This kind of begging and pleading simply shows a woman that you're desperate and often drives them even further away.
Some men will try the opposite tactic to pleading and they'll turn to bribery. Buying her expensive gifts or taking her to fancy restaurants in an attempt to impress her won't work either. She may accept your tokens, but bribery isn't the way to win back love.
The vast majority of women want to be in a relationship with a man who will listen to what she has to say. Even if she's just making small talk, it's important to her that she's heard. This doesn't mean you have to agree with everything she says. You just need to listen.
When asked if they're willing to listen to their ex girlfriends, men who are trying hard to get back their ex often say 'I've tried to listen, but she doesn't listen to a word I say.' Sometimes when men think they're listening, what they're really doing is hearing the problem and then immediately talking back to offer a solution to fix whatever problem his girlfriend is having. He believes because she doesn't hear a word he says that she's not listening.
However, only hearing the parts of the conversation you think you can help her with and then trying to make her listen to you first is not the same as YOU listening to your girlfriend's needs. Women appreciate men who listen to them. Unfortunately, men communicate in slightly different ways, which could probably have been a contributing factor to your break up in the first place.
If you're still thinking 'I'm still in love with my ex-girlfriend and want to get her back', then practice listening. Ask her a question and then listen to what she says intently. Make a comment about her response or ask another question relating to her response, but don't try to fix it or dismiss it as unimportant. Simply listen to her.
Women assume that a man who listens to her really cares. It tells you that you understand and that you're really interested. The next time you receive an opportunity to get together with your ex, take some time to establish eye contact and really listen intently to what she says.
At first, you might find your ex-girlfriend is a little confused or guarded about your sudden change, but when she realizes that you are interested in what she's saying she'll begin to relax and realize that you do care. She'll immediately begin wondering why her feelings for you went away and they should come rushing back when she understands that you really do still love your ex and really do want her back.
For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Save A Relationship - Take Baby Steps
Well the good news is that if both of you are agreeable, the actual process of how to save a relationship is fairly easy. If both of you still want to be life partners then you know that you love each other; but for some reason are finding it hard to communicate right now.
Life gets in the way of relationships. There is no two ways around that. Unfortunately we are all guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. We can spend time sorting out our kids problems, our friends problems perhaps even those of our work colleagues only to arrive home in a heap exhausted. We often assume that our partner can read our mind and know that we love and care about them.
But no matter how secure someone is, if they constantly feel or are made feel that they belong at the bottom of a very long list of priorities, they may leave. Feelings of resentment can grow over time and become rather like a snowball - small to start but soon takes on huge proportions.
The first step would be to arrange a night where both of you are free to concentrate 100% on your relationship. Get a sitter for the kids and head out somewhere for the evening. If you pick a public place, you are less likely to let your resentments boil over into an argument.
Agree that both of you want this relationship to work and reassure each other that you are committed to your partnership. Arrange a series of date nights - these nights are for you two as a couple. You could each write out a list of what you would like to try in the relationship be it a night at the Opera or a particular technique in the bedroom. Then take turns trying to fulfill the other person's wishes.
In addition to the lists of treats you would like, you also should make a list of all that you enjoy about the relationship and then a list of the problem areas as you each see them.
Spending time together away from the hassles of real life will help you to rediscover the magic that brought you together. Sharing the above lists will help you to realize what you have and what you need to work on.
Now it could be easy for one party to become offended at what is written down. You both need to know that this exercise has been done solely to increase the satisfaction level in your relationship not to knock the other person's confidence or blame them for the problems. Try not to become defensive but listen to both the good parts and the bad. Try not to go to bed on an argument as unresolved conflict can cause more resentment. Showing love and appreciation goes a long way believe me.
By encouraging open communication and time for each other you should find that your commitment to each other becomes stronger and your friends will soon be asking you for advice on how to save a relationship. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Life gets in the way of relationships. There is no two ways around that. Unfortunately we are all guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. We can spend time sorting out our kids problems, our friends problems perhaps even those of our work colleagues only to arrive home in a heap exhausted. We often assume that our partner can read our mind and know that we love and care about them.
But no matter how secure someone is, if they constantly feel or are made feel that they belong at the bottom of a very long list of priorities, they may leave. Feelings of resentment can grow over time and become rather like a snowball - small to start but soon takes on huge proportions.
The first step would be to arrange a night where both of you are free to concentrate 100% on your relationship. Get a sitter for the kids and head out somewhere for the evening. If you pick a public place, you are less likely to let your resentments boil over into an argument.
Agree that both of you want this relationship to work and reassure each other that you are committed to your partnership. Arrange a series of date nights - these nights are for you two as a couple. You could each write out a list of what you would like to try in the relationship be it a night at the Opera or a particular technique in the bedroom. Then take turns trying to fulfill the other person's wishes.
In addition to the lists of treats you would like, you also should make a list of all that you enjoy about the relationship and then a list of the problem areas as you each see them.
Spending time together away from the hassles of real life will help you to rediscover the magic that brought you together. Sharing the above lists will help you to realize what you have and what you need to work on.
Now it could be easy for one party to become offended at what is written down. You both need to know that this exercise has been done solely to increase the satisfaction level in your relationship not to knock the other person's confidence or blame them for the problems. Try not to become defensive but listen to both the good parts and the bad. Try not to go to bed on an argument as unresolved conflict can cause more resentment. Showing love and appreciation goes a long way believe me.
By encouraging open communication and time for each other you should find that your commitment to each other becomes stronger and your friends will soon be asking you for advice on how to save a relationship. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Build Trust In A Relationship
Building trust in a relationship can be very difficult depending on the circumstances. If one partner had an affair, then it may take several years to build trust in a relationship. It can be done and marriages survive affairs but it will take time. The person who had the affair will need to apologize to his/her partner and then be prepared for that person to learn to trust them again.
But trust is something that needs to be built up in every partnership. After all you are going to share your life with this other person so you need to know that they share the same values as you do. If you are trying to build mutual reliance there are several ways of doing this:
1) Make sure your words and actions match. If you say you are going to be home at a certain time, then make sure you are or else phone in advance to explain why. It is the little gestures that define who we are.
2) Always tell the truth no matter how painful. Lies destroy every type of relationship from friendships through to marriage. Telling the truth isn't always the easy option but it is the safest. If your partner knows that you always tell the truth, they will trust you much quicker. If they hear you telling lies to others, even those that you dismiss as being small or white lies, they will have less belief in you.
3)Do not keep secrets when in a relationship. Now I don't mean that you have to tell your new boyfriend or girlfriend your deepest secrets but as soon as the relationship looks like it is becoming serious, it is a good time to make sure that any relevant history is out in the open.
4) You need to have faith in your partner before expecting them to return that trust. If you have to text them morning and night wondering where they are and who they are with, they are likely to think you have something to hide.
5) Don't be unrealistic. All relationships have issues even those that have been happily married for 50 years. You need to accept that being part of a couple means that you take the good times and the bad. If you bolt at the first sign of trouble, your partner is never likely to trust you.
6) Finally rely on yourself to do the right thing. You must first know yourself and trust in your ability to make the right choices before you can trust anyone else. You have to know what your own goals and aspirations are in life before you can share a meaningful existence with someone else. Somebody with a defined sense of values is more likely to trust another person as they will quickly recognize these similar values.
All good relationships are built on a number of factors so learn how to build trust in a relationship now to increase your chance of success. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
But trust is something that needs to be built up in every partnership. After all you are going to share your life with this other person so you need to know that they share the same values as you do. If you are trying to build mutual reliance there are several ways of doing this:
1) Make sure your words and actions match. If you say you are going to be home at a certain time, then make sure you are or else phone in advance to explain why. It is the little gestures that define who we are.
2) Always tell the truth no matter how painful. Lies destroy every type of relationship from friendships through to marriage. Telling the truth isn't always the easy option but it is the safest. If your partner knows that you always tell the truth, they will trust you much quicker. If they hear you telling lies to others, even those that you dismiss as being small or white lies, they will have less belief in you.
3)Do not keep secrets when in a relationship. Now I don't mean that you have to tell your new boyfriend or girlfriend your deepest secrets but as soon as the relationship looks like it is becoming serious, it is a good time to make sure that any relevant history is out in the open.
4) You need to have faith in your partner before expecting them to return that trust. If you have to text them morning and night wondering where they are and who they are with, they are likely to think you have something to hide.
5) Don't be unrealistic. All relationships have issues even those that have been happily married for 50 years. You need to accept that being part of a couple means that you take the good times and the bad. If you bolt at the first sign of trouble, your partner is never likely to trust you.
6) Finally rely on yourself to do the right thing. You must first know yourself and trust in your ability to make the right choices before you can trust anyone else. You have to know what your own goals and aspirations are in life before you can share a meaningful existence with someone else. Somebody with a defined sense of values is more likely to trust another person as they will quickly recognize these similar values.
All good relationships are built on a number of factors so learn how to build trust in a relationship now to increase your chance of success. For more information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How A Rebound Relationship Can Work
Are you worried about your new partner and whether they are committed to you? Do you wonder how a rebound relationship can work particularly if there are unresolved feelings left from the previous affair?
Often rebound relationships can be a band aid solution for the pain and hurt inflicted by the previous lover. If the person getting involved in the new relationship was the one to end the old one, I would be less worried. Usually people have been thinking of ending a relationship for ages before the event actually happens. By the time they get to finish it, they may have worked through their feelings and be ready to move on.
This doesn't apply to the person who didn’t instigate the previous breakup and becomes quickly involved in a new relationship. Some people cannot bear to be on their own so will flit from person to person in an effort to avoid dealing with the issues leading to the breakup. They are used to being part of a couple. They have an inherent need for someone to love them and need them and hence they can become deeply emotionally involved very quickly. Ironically this is often the reason for the rebound relationship breaking up as the new partner feels swapped by the level of neediness.
It is worth noting that often someone on the rebound often isn't even aware of what they are doing. They are hurting emotionally and mentally and can crave comfort from another human being. This can mean that they end up in a relationship for the sake of having somebody to hold rather than to be with that person. Their new partner can get very hurt as the realization sets in that they aren’t loved for their individuality as much as the fact they can provide a quick fix solution to a painful situation.
It is always wise to date people who have just come out of a relationship with care. Take things slowly and try to make sure that it is you they are interested in before becoming emotionally involved. Everyone needs time on their own particularly if they come out of a long term partnership.
It is a little like grieving - there is a process that you must go through in order to emerge a stronger person at the end of it. For most people divorce and the breakup of a partnership means the end of a dream even if you were the one to instigate the break up. Everyone will have some feelings of regret if only for not having the fairytale ending.
If you do find yourself involved with someone who you suspect is on the rebound, gently advise them to spend some time on their own working through their emotions. Encourage them to date other people. Keep in contact with them if you are interested in a long term relationship. If you two are destined to be together, it will happen although maybe not right away. This is really the only way to ensure how a rebound relationship can work for you.
For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Often rebound relationships can be a band aid solution for the pain and hurt inflicted by the previous lover. If the person getting involved in the new relationship was the one to end the old one, I would be less worried. Usually people have been thinking of ending a relationship for ages before the event actually happens. By the time they get to finish it, they may have worked through their feelings and be ready to move on.
This doesn't apply to the person who didn’t instigate the previous breakup and becomes quickly involved in a new relationship. Some people cannot bear to be on their own so will flit from person to person in an effort to avoid dealing with the issues leading to the breakup. They are used to being part of a couple. They have an inherent need for someone to love them and need them and hence they can become deeply emotionally involved very quickly. Ironically this is often the reason for the rebound relationship breaking up as the new partner feels swapped by the level of neediness.
It is worth noting that often someone on the rebound often isn't even aware of what they are doing. They are hurting emotionally and mentally and can crave comfort from another human being. This can mean that they end up in a relationship for the sake of having somebody to hold rather than to be with that person. Their new partner can get very hurt as the realization sets in that they aren’t loved for their individuality as much as the fact they can provide a quick fix solution to a painful situation.
It is always wise to date people who have just come out of a relationship with care. Take things slowly and try to make sure that it is you they are interested in before becoming emotionally involved. Everyone needs time on their own particularly if they come out of a long term partnership.
It is a little like grieving - there is a process that you must go through in order to emerge a stronger person at the end of it. For most people divorce and the breakup of a partnership means the end of a dream even if you were the one to instigate the break up. Everyone will have some feelings of regret if only for not having the fairytale ending.
If you do find yourself involved with someone who you suspect is on the rebound, gently advise them to spend some time on their own working through their emotions. Encourage them to date other people. Keep in contact with them if you are interested in a long term relationship. If you two are destined to be together, it will happen although maybe not right away. This is really the only way to ensure how a rebound relationship can work for you.
For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Great Relationship Advice For Men
Men often wonder if they are speaking the same language as women because they can land in hot water very quickly. They look for relationship advice for men in order to avoid these situations but most relationship advice is written by women for other women.
There are some basic rules that men need to understand in order to increase their success rate with women.
The first one is you need to worry when your woman gives you the silent treatment. Most men go silent because they have nothing left to say but when a woman goes silent, it is generally a bit hint that you have upset her. Whilst you may think that silence is golden, women use not talking as a punishment. So if your lady friend has a silent day, think back over your actions and try to determine what you have done to upset her.
Secondly, PMT is not always the reason for a woman being in a bad mood. Sometimes they are upset and hurt over something and it has nothing to do with when their period is due. If you constantly blame PMT, you will probably find yourself searching the lonely hearts columns in the near future.
Women like to talk about their problems but this doesn't mean that they want you to fix everything. Most females are quite capable of looking after themselves and they just want to let off steam. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason. Just in case, it was so you could listen to what your partner is saying before you jump in with the solution. Do yourself a favor and believe that silence in this instance goes a long way.
When looking for relationship advice for men, they often look in the wrong places. It is not ideal to ask your partners father what her problem is. Firstly he is unlikely to understand her any more than you do but being the apple of his eye, he will wonder what you have done to upset her.
It helps to remember that your female partner and an elephant have something in common - their memory. Your partner will never forget anything so don't be surprised if she has a list a mile long of all the things you did wrong in the last six months.
Try talking to your partner. Tell her often how much you love and appreciate her and cuddle her without always expecting it to lead to sex. Like people of both sexes, women like to be held and appreciated without feeling they have to give you something in return.
Also if you are worried about something speak to your partner. Whilst she may be female, she is not helpless and two heads are often better than one at solving a problem. In addition, if she knows what is bothering you she is less likely to become emotionally distant having decided that you must be having an affair or are planning to leave her.
Life long partnerships take work on both sides but be careful what sources you use as relationship advice for men.
For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
There are some basic rules that men need to understand in order to increase their success rate with women.
The first one is you need to worry when your woman gives you the silent treatment. Most men go silent because they have nothing left to say but when a woman goes silent, it is generally a bit hint that you have upset her. Whilst you may think that silence is golden, women use not talking as a punishment. So if your lady friend has a silent day, think back over your actions and try to determine what you have done to upset her.
Secondly, PMT is not always the reason for a woman being in a bad mood. Sometimes they are upset and hurt over something and it has nothing to do with when their period is due. If you constantly blame PMT, you will probably find yourself searching the lonely hearts columns in the near future.
Women like to talk about their problems but this doesn't mean that they want you to fix everything. Most females are quite capable of looking after themselves and they just want to let off steam. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason. Just in case, it was so you could listen to what your partner is saying before you jump in with the solution. Do yourself a favor and believe that silence in this instance goes a long way.
When looking for relationship advice for men, they often look in the wrong places. It is not ideal to ask your partners father what her problem is. Firstly he is unlikely to understand her any more than you do but being the apple of his eye, he will wonder what you have done to upset her.
It helps to remember that your female partner and an elephant have something in common - their memory. Your partner will never forget anything so don't be surprised if she has a list a mile long of all the things you did wrong in the last six months.
Try talking to your partner. Tell her often how much you love and appreciate her and cuddle her without always expecting it to lead to sex. Like people of both sexes, women like to be held and appreciated without feeling they have to give you something in return.
Also if you are worried about something speak to your partner. Whilst she may be female, she is not helpless and two heads are often better than one at solving a problem. In addition, if she knows what is bothering you she is less likely to become emotionally distant having decided that you must be having an affair or are planning to leave her.
Life long partnerships take work on both sides but be careful what sources you use as relationship advice for men.
For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Tips To Getting Your Ex Back
Getting your ex back dominates the thoughts of many a man and woman. Perhaps you were the one to finish the relationship thinking that life was passing you by. Having been in the nightmare that is the singles world, you have decided that your ex was fantastic and now you need to know how to get them back. Or maybe you were the one who was dumped but having had time to pull yourself together you are determined to teach your former partner the error of their ways.
Before you consider how to get your ex back in your life, you should be 100% sure that this is the outcome that you want. You are going to spend a lot of time and energy achieving this wish but it will be a waste of everyone's time if you are doing it solely for revenge. This applies to those people that have been dumped so start dreaming of revenge and how it will make them feel better. One quote that I believe in is revenge is a dish best served cold. What it means is that you have to let your emotions, primarily your anger, cool off before taking any action. What I believe the quote is trying to achieve is that by the time you have cooled down, you will forget about your ex and be putting your energies into meeting someone new.
But for those of us who have decided that our ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend was the ONE, here are some tips to try to getting your ex back.
1) Do not appear needy. Desperation is never an attractive quality. You will be far more successful in attracting your ex mate if you appear to be living your life to the full. Don't call or make contact with them. You will have sufficient mutual friends to be able to appear to be in the same location as your ex by accident.
2) Do not stalk your ex - again this is not the way forward. You want them to come back to you not have them report you to the police for stalking.
3) Always look your best. Wear their favorite clothes, hairstyle, makeup etc. Remember all those little details that used to drive them wild and use them to your advantage.
4) Do not try and make your ex jealous by dating someone else. This is juvenile behavior. There is never an excuse for using another person in this way.
5) Try being direct. Men and women often have communication issues hence the best selling books such as "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" etc. So sometimes the best way to getting your ex back is just to tell them how you feel. Apart from a little pride, what do you have to lose?
If you are certain that getting your ex back in your life will make you happy, you need to pull out all the stops! For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Before you consider how to get your ex back in your life, you should be 100% sure that this is the outcome that you want. You are going to spend a lot of time and energy achieving this wish but it will be a waste of everyone's time if you are doing it solely for revenge. This applies to those people that have been dumped so start dreaming of revenge and how it will make them feel better. One quote that I believe in is revenge is a dish best served cold. What it means is that you have to let your emotions, primarily your anger, cool off before taking any action. What I believe the quote is trying to achieve is that by the time you have cooled down, you will forget about your ex and be putting your energies into meeting someone new.
But for those of us who have decided that our ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend was the ONE, here are some tips to try to getting your ex back.
1) Do not appear needy. Desperation is never an attractive quality. You will be far more successful in attracting your ex mate if you appear to be living your life to the full. Don't call or make contact with them. You will have sufficient mutual friends to be able to appear to be in the same location as your ex by accident.
2) Do not stalk your ex - again this is not the way forward. You want them to come back to you not have them report you to the police for stalking.
3) Always look your best. Wear their favorite clothes, hairstyle, makeup etc. Remember all those little details that used to drive them wild and use them to your advantage.
4) Do not try and make your ex jealous by dating someone else. This is juvenile behavior. There is never an excuse for using another person in this way.
5) Try being direct. Men and women often have communication issues hence the best selling books such as "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" etc. So sometimes the best way to getting your ex back is just to tell them how you feel. Apart from a little pride, what do you have to lose?
If you are certain that getting your ex back in your life will make you happy, you need to pull out all the stops! For more valuable information, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Win Back Lost Love
If you are determined to win back lost love, then go for it. You only have one life and it is up to you how you live it. If you are sure that this person is the right partner for you, go get him/her today.
Be strong and single-minded in your approach. Now you know what you want, it will be easier to ignore everyone else's advice and well meaning contributions. If this person is your lost love, then trust your own judgment. You know them better than anyone else so you should be able to work out how best to get them to return to you.
Be sure of your motives in particular that you are not trying to rekindle lost love because you are afraid of being on your own. Being single can be fun, it just takes a little getting used to. It is hard to be objective when emotions are involved so it is always a good idea to write down a list of all the reasons why you want this person back. Also write down a list of why the relationship failed. Obviously you would expect the first list to be the long one!
Sometimes people break up and it is the wrong decision. We can all take our lives for granted and as we get older we sometimes wonder if we have missed out. These feelings can cause people to do silly things like walking out on their relationship. If being apart has shown you the error of your ways, then make contact with them and ask to meet up.
If you hurt your ex, you must be prepared to take things very slowly and at their pace. They are unlikely to fall in your arms declaring undying love if you have hurt them badly. If they do, you must still proceed with caution as any lingering problems need to be resolved.
Be aware that no matter how much you miss the other person, there was a reason why you broke up and that needs to be dealt with to prevent it causing fresh problems. There are some things that just cannot be overcome no matter how much we love the other person. The idea that love conquers everything belongs in Hollywood not in real life.
If, for example, you broke up because your partner wants children and you don't then it is unfair to get back together unless you have changed your mind. Denying another person the chance of having children causes the type of pressure that very few if any relationships can survive. The resentment will probably kill the love you shared.
If you have issues that can be resolved with some mutual work, then go for it. Life is too short to waste time in regrets. Sometimes it is not always the easy way forward to try to win back lost love but often it is the best step you could ever take.
For more valuable information on how to win back a lost love, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Be strong and single-minded in your approach. Now you know what you want, it will be easier to ignore everyone else's advice and well meaning contributions. If this person is your lost love, then trust your own judgment. You know them better than anyone else so you should be able to work out how best to get them to return to you.
Be sure of your motives in particular that you are not trying to rekindle lost love because you are afraid of being on your own. Being single can be fun, it just takes a little getting used to. It is hard to be objective when emotions are involved so it is always a good idea to write down a list of all the reasons why you want this person back. Also write down a list of why the relationship failed. Obviously you would expect the first list to be the long one!
Sometimes people break up and it is the wrong decision. We can all take our lives for granted and as we get older we sometimes wonder if we have missed out. These feelings can cause people to do silly things like walking out on their relationship. If being apart has shown you the error of your ways, then make contact with them and ask to meet up.
If you hurt your ex, you must be prepared to take things very slowly and at their pace. They are unlikely to fall in your arms declaring undying love if you have hurt them badly. If they do, you must still proceed with caution as any lingering problems need to be resolved.
Be aware that no matter how much you miss the other person, there was a reason why you broke up and that needs to be dealt with to prevent it causing fresh problems. There are some things that just cannot be overcome no matter how much we love the other person. The idea that love conquers everything belongs in Hollywood not in real life.
If, for example, you broke up because your partner wants children and you don't then it is unfair to get back together unless you have changed your mind. Denying another person the chance of having children causes the type of pressure that very few if any relationships can survive. The resentment will probably kill the love you shared.
If you have issues that can be resolved with some mutual work, then go for it. Life is too short to waste time in regrets. Sometimes it is not always the easy way forward to try to win back lost love but often it is the best step you could ever take.
For more valuable information on how to win back a lost love, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
What To Do When Your Ex Has Just Broken Up With You
We all panic when we break up and when your ex has just broken up with you, you are likely to feel hurt, angry and perhaps a little bewildered.
So what can you do? It really depends on whether you want this man or not. If you don't want him in your life, allow yourself to grieve for the relationship and then look forward to having fun being single. Don't waste time trying to get revenge on this man as you will only end up hurting yourself.
But if you really want this man in your life and perhaps feel your behavior has contributed to the break up, there are a couple of things you can do.
Your first one is to let him know how you feel. Write him a letter, apologizing for any bad behavior and reminding him of the good times you shared together. Don't be afraid to tell him how much he means to you and how much you miss him.
Assuming you get a positive response to your letter, agree to meet him but do so in a public place. This will help prevent your discussions turning into a huge argument. You will need to be prepared to tell your man how you feel. Don't hide your feelings. If you are angry tell him why but try not to turn the meeting into a blame fest.
This will not help you in convincing him that you are good together. Keep the conversation to facts and also use the word I and not you. For example you should say "I feel let down" rather than "you let me down". This is a lot less confrontational and less likely to cause offense or lead to another argument.
Allow him to criticize you as well. It is best if this is done in a constructive way. We all have our faults and some of your less attractive character traits may be, in part, to blame for why he broke up with you.
It is very important that you listen to what he says. Don't assume you know what he is trying to say. Encourage him to say what is on his mind as this is the opportunity for you both to work through any issues in your relationship and come out of this a stronger couple. He may have made the decision to break up, but your behavior probably contributed to his decision.
Do not play games and don't feel that you have to hold something back in order to make him come back to you. This will only cause feelings of resentment which may lead to you splitting up again. Don't look on a breakup as a negative. All couples go through good and bad patches. It is a normal feature of adult relationships.
Follow these tips and one day as a happy couple, you may actually be thankful that for the day you found out that your ex has just broken up with you.
For more valuable information on what to do when your ex has just broken up with you, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
So what can you do? It really depends on whether you want this man or not. If you don't want him in your life, allow yourself to grieve for the relationship and then look forward to having fun being single. Don't waste time trying to get revenge on this man as you will only end up hurting yourself.
But if you really want this man in your life and perhaps feel your behavior has contributed to the break up, there are a couple of things you can do.
Your first one is to let him know how you feel. Write him a letter, apologizing for any bad behavior and reminding him of the good times you shared together. Don't be afraid to tell him how much he means to you and how much you miss him.
Assuming you get a positive response to your letter, agree to meet him but do so in a public place. This will help prevent your discussions turning into a huge argument. You will need to be prepared to tell your man how you feel. Don't hide your feelings. If you are angry tell him why but try not to turn the meeting into a blame fest.
This will not help you in convincing him that you are good together. Keep the conversation to facts and also use the word I and not you. For example you should say "I feel let down" rather than "you let me down". This is a lot less confrontational and less likely to cause offense or lead to another argument.
Allow him to criticize you as well. It is best if this is done in a constructive way. We all have our faults and some of your less attractive character traits may be, in part, to blame for why he broke up with you.
It is very important that you listen to what he says. Don't assume you know what he is trying to say. Encourage him to say what is on his mind as this is the opportunity for you both to work through any issues in your relationship and come out of this a stronger couple. He may have made the decision to break up, but your behavior probably contributed to his decision.
Do not play games and don't feel that you have to hold something back in order to make him come back to you. This will only cause feelings of resentment which may lead to you splitting up again. Don't look on a breakup as a negative. All couples go through good and bad patches. It is a normal feature of adult relationships.
Follow these tips and one day as a happy couple, you may actually be thankful that for the day you found out that your ex has just broken up with you.
For more valuable information on what to do when your ex has just broken up with you, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Get A Guy Back After A Breakup
Are you sure that you want to get your guy back after a breakup? It can be hard to know exactly how you feel in the days following the breakdown of your relationship. Feelings of loneliness and wounded pride can be confused with real love. It is always a good idea to try and analyze your relationship and why it failed. If the reason is that long term you are not compatible then do yourself a favor and move onto the next guy. You and your ex deserve to be happy but this does not necessarily mean that will be as a couple.
But if you are genuinely pining for him try these tips:
1) Never stalk a guy to get back with him. He won't find it flattering but will think you have lost your mental capacity. You need to project a confident image even if your insides resemble melting ice-cream.
2) Always look your best whenever you go out. As Helena Rubenstein once said, there is no such thing as an ugly woman, only lazy ones. Now is not the time to let yourself go. Get your hair done, always wear make up and wear the clothes that show off your body in the best light. Don't change your image. He fell for you the way you are so now is not the time to change.
3) Try to determine why you were dumped. Did you behave badly? If you did, then you need to apologize and do this properly. Men have feelings too although they usually manage to hide them better than women.
4) Did you play too many games? I don't know what it is about us women but for some reason we sometimes treat relationships as if they were a game of Chess. If I do this, he will do that approach doesn’t work in most cases and men, like all human beings, do not like being played. Honesty is always the best policy. If you have been playing games as you were trying to see if your feelings were returned, then just ask him out straight. Most men like the direct approach - they are not very good at reading signs and subtle hints.
If you do get back together, make sure that you have sorted out the problems that caused the break up in the first place. Failure to do so just means that you are postponing your heartache. If you are looking to spend your life with this guy you need to be sure that you are compatible in all areas. While sexual attraction is fantastic and in my view a necessary part of every good relationship it isn’t the only thing that matters. Mutual respect, appreciation and shared values go a long way to avoiding having to deal once again with the question of how to get a guy back after a break up.
For more information on how to get a guy back after a breakup, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
But if you are genuinely pining for him try these tips:
1) Never stalk a guy to get back with him. He won't find it flattering but will think you have lost your mental capacity. You need to project a confident image even if your insides resemble melting ice-cream.
2) Always look your best whenever you go out. As Helena Rubenstein once said, there is no such thing as an ugly woman, only lazy ones. Now is not the time to let yourself go. Get your hair done, always wear make up and wear the clothes that show off your body in the best light. Don't change your image. He fell for you the way you are so now is not the time to change.
3) Try to determine why you were dumped. Did you behave badly? If you did, then you need to apologize and do this properly. Men have feelings too although they usually manage to hide them better than women.
4) Did you play too many games? I don't know what it is about us women but for some reason we sometimes treat relationships as if they were a game of Chess. If I do this, he will do that approach doesn’t work in most cases and men, like all human beings, do not like being played. Honesty is always the best policy. If you have been playing games as you were trying to see if your feelings were returned, then just ask him out straight. Most men like the direct approach - they are not very good at reading signs and subtle hints.
If you do get back together, make sure that you have sorted out the problems that caused the break up in the first place. Failure to do so just means that you are postponing your heartache. If you are looking to spend your life with this guy you need to be sure that you are compatible in all areas. While sexual attraction is fantastic and in my view a necessary part of every good relationship it isn’t the only thing that matters. Mutual respect, appreciation and shared values go a long way to avoiding having to deal once again with the question of how to get a guy back after a break up.
For more information on how to get a guy back after a breakup, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Does My Ex Want To Get Back With Me?
Do you care? Asking yourself the question does my ex want to get back with me is the wrong way forward. The real question is do you want your ex back? If the answer to that is yes, then you can start worrying about what your previous partner wants.
A lot of people never understand why their relationship ended. I find it amazing that many people going through a divorce are unable to explain why they are ending their marriage, especially when there are children involved.
It takes two to break up a relationship despite the fact that it is very easy to blame the other person. Even when someone else has an affair, it isn't always 100% their fault. Don't get me wrong, I am not condoning anyone being unfaithful but sometimes people are pushed into things. If you take your man or woman for granted and forget to pay them any attention, they may end up looking somewhere else. Some people will have affairs just because they can get away with it. These people do not belong in a monogamous relationship. But sometimes, a relationship is worth saving and the affair, whilst hurtful, can eventually strengthen the bonds between the couple.
Examining why a couple broke up will help both parties understand the issues in their relationship. It will highlight those areas that require work. All partnerships involve work and commitment. Men and women often appear to live on different planets never mind speak other languages. My husband once said to my Dad that he didn’t understand me. My dads’ reply: that is where you are going wrong son you Never try to understand a woman!
Whilst it is the sexual attraction that initially attracts men and women, it is their compatibility that will keep them together long after the sexual flame resembles a candle as opposed to a flame thrower. So before you start wondering how your ex partner is feeling, you need to be certain of your own wants and desires. Are you sure that this person is right for you? Do you see yourself spending the rest of your life with them? Do you want the same things out of life i.e. kids, traveling, similar standard of living etc? Do you share the same ideals and views about how to live your life?
It is very important to first establish if you would like to try again. Knowing what you want will help you to work out what your ex wants. Despite what Hollywood and other entertainment providers would have you believe, men want stable happy relationships just as much as women. Generally the male is not as good as vocalizing what he wants and can finish a relationship rather than have to deal with a bad patch.
So instead of wasting time trying to answer does my ex want to get back with me, why not invite him round for coffee and see what happens.
For more information on this topic, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
A lot of people never understand why their relationship ended. I find it amazing that many people going through a divorce are unable to explain why they are ending their marriage, especially when there are children involved.
It takes two to break up a relationship despite the fact that it is very easy to blame the other person. Even when someone else has an affair, it isn't always 100% their fault. Don't get me wrong, I am not condoning anyone being unfaithful but sometimes people are pushed into things. If you take your man or woman for granted and forget to pay them any attention, they may end up looking somewhere else. Some people will have affairs just because they can get away with it. These people do not belong in a monogamous relationship. But sometimes, a relationship is worth saving and the affair, whilst hurtful, can eventually strengthen the bonds between the couple.
Examining why a couple broke up will help both parties understand the issues in their relationship. It will highlight those areas that require work. All partnerships involve work and commitment. Men and women often appear to live on different planets never mind speak other languages. My husband once said to my Dad that he didn’t understand me. My dads’ reply: that is where you are going wrong son you Never try to understand a woman!
Whilst it is the sexual attraction that initially attracts men and women, it is their compatibility that will keep them together long after the sexual flame resembles a candle as opposed to a flame thrower. So before you start wondering how your ex partner is feeling, you need to be certain of your own wants and desires. Are you sure that this person is right for you? Do you see yourself spending the rest of your life with them? Do you want the same things out of life i.e. kids, traveling, similar standard of living etc? Do you share the same ideals and views about how to live your life?
It is very important to first establish if you would like to try again. Knowing what you want will help you to work out what your ex wants. Despite what Hollywood and other entertainment providers would have you believe, men want stable happy relationships just as much as women. Generally the male is not as good as vocalizing what he wants and can finish a relationship rather than have to deal with a bad patch.
So instead of wasting time trying to answer does my ex want to get back with me, why not invite him round for coffee and see what happens.
For more information on this topic, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Are You Sure You Want Your Ex Back?
So the relationship is over but now you have decided that you want your ex back. Are your sure it is your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend you are missing and not just having someone special in your life? This is especially important if you were the one who decided to break up.
Most relationships go through a bad patch at some point. Some of the best marriages have survived problems that would have torn apart less sturdy partnerships. Relationships are all about give and take. That doesn't mean that one person gives and the other takes! Men and women are very different and we need to learn to live with one another.
Deciding you want to share your life with someone is a big commitment. The sexual attraction between a couple, especially in the early stages, can often cloud their judgment and it is surprising how many people enter into long term relationships without having agreed the basics. Little things like where you want to live and whether you want to have children are often forgotten in the excitement of being together.
Men and women fall out for all sorts of reasons. At times of financial and family stress, we often pick on those nearest to us. When you care for another person and know them intimately you have the power to really hurt that person. If we ourselves are hurting, we often turn that hurt and anger onto the other person.
It is important to understand why you broke up in the first place. If you ended the relationship because one of you wanted children and the other didn't, then you will find that this probably hasn't changed. You may get back together but in the long run will split up again if this issue is not resolved. Forcing someone into a huge life commitment like having a child against their will does not usually result in a long term happy relationship. If you have very different viewpoints on these life issues, you should stay apart and find someone more compatible to fall in love with.
If, on the other hand, you split up because of jealousy or some other petty incident then your relationship may be worth saving. If you really miss your previous partner and know that you want to share your life with them, then you must do everything in your power to get back with your ex.
Contact your partner and let him/her know that you would like to meet up to discuss the future. Do not get involved in a dissection of what went wrong before. It is too easy to put the blame on the other person. Instead agree that there were problems but that you would like to rekindle the relationship. If you want your ex back and your relationship was serious then you might want to suggest counseling. It is often helpful to have an impartial person listen to your discussions. You are less likely to lose your temper, storm out and find yourself suddenly single again.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
Most relationships go through a bad patch at some point. Some of the best marriages have survived problems that would have torn apart less sturdy partnerships. Relationships are all about give and take. That doesn't mean that one person gives and the other takes! Men and women are very different and we need to learn to live with one another.
Deciding you want to share your life with someone is a big commitment. The sexual attraction between a couple, especially in the early stages, can often cloud their judgment and it is surprising how many people enter into long term relationships without having agreed the basics. Little things like where you want to live and whether you want to have children are often forgotten in the excitement of being together.
Men and women fall out for all sorts of reasons. At times of financial and family stress, we often pick on those nearest to us. When you care for another person and know them intimately you have the power to really hurt that person. If we ourselves are hurting, we often turn that hurt and anger onto the other person.
It is important to understand why you broke up in the first place. If you ended the relationship because one of you wanted children and the other didn't, then you will find that this probably hasn't changed. You may get back together but in the long run will split up again if this issue is not resolved. Forcing someone into a huge life commitment like having a child against their will does not usually result in a long term happy relationship. If you have very different viewpoints on these life issues, you should stay apart and find someone more compatible to fall in love with.
If, on the other hand, you split up because of jealousy or some other petty incident then your relationship may be worth saving. If you really miss your previous partner and know that you want to share your life with them, then you must do everything in your power to get back with your ex.
Contact your partner and let him/her know that you would like to meet up to discuss the future. Do not get involved in a dissection of what went wrong before. It is too easy to put the blame on the other person. Instead agree that there were problems but that you would like to rekindle the relationship. If you want your ex back and your relationship was serious then you might want to suggest counseling. It is often helpful to have an impartial person listen to your discussions. You are less likely to lose your temper, storm out and find yourself suddenly single again.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up".
How To Go Get An Ex Back The Right Way
How to go get an ex back is a fairly common question but one that should be relatively easy to answer. If you were to blame for the breakup then you should apologize. We should always treat others as we would like to be treated but sometimes we can treat our neighbors better than our partners. Having someone special in our lives can mean that we take them for granted and expect them to put up with our black moods, PMS or other human failings.
So say you are sorry and mean it. Don't just say it to get your ex back but mean it regardless of what the future holds for you. Arrange a meeting with your ex to discuss what went wrong and see if you do have a future together. You should agree some basic ground rules or else you run the risk of it turning into a blame fest.
The first rule is that both of you should be there because you want to be not because you are being emotionally blackmailed. This is particularly true if you have kids together as one partner can often put pressure on the other to stay together for the sake of the children. Believe me, most kids would prefer to have two different families than to witness two people tearing each other apart.
The second rule should be that you are not getting together to have an argument - if either party gets abusive then the meeting is over. You are there to have a discussion about your relationship and see if you would both like to take it forward. It may be helpful to set a time limit for each person to talk about how they are feeling. When they are talking the other person should be listening.
This is a time for you both to express what you like about each other and what parts of your life together could do with a little work. Perhaps you never get to spend time alone together so an idea may be that you have a date night once a week or a fortnight. This is a night where it is just the two of you and all talk of kids, mortgage, debts etc is banned. This would be your time as a couple to try to relight the forces of attraction that brought you together in the first place.
You will probably find that both of you are finding the same issues difficult. You both probably miss spending quality time together and you may both be under financial and emotional pressure. Sometimes life gets in the way and we often expect our partners to become mind readers and be able to see a problem without us saying anything. We don’t tend to make time in our lives to really talk to our spouse. It is never too late to start.
Now when you are asked how to go get an ex back, you will be able to say that communication and quality time together are the keys to lifelong happiness.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
So say you are sorry and mean it. Don't just say it to get your ex back but mean it regardless of what the future holds for you. Arrange a meeting with your ex to discuss what went wrong and see if you do have a future together. You should agree some basic ground rules or else you run the risk of it turning into a blame fest.
The first rule is that both of you should be there because you want to be not because you are being emotionally blackmailed. This is particularly true if you have kids together as one partner can often put pressure on the other to stay together for the sake of the children. Believe me, most kids would prefer to have two different families than to witness two people tearing each other apart.
The second rule should be that you are not getting together to have an argument - if either party gets abusive then the meeting is over. You are there to have a discussion about your relationship and see if you would both like to take it forward. It may be helpful to set a time limit for each person to talk about how they are feeling. When they are talking the other person should be listening.
This is a time for you both to express what you like about each other and what parts of your life together could do with a little work. Perhaps you never get to spend time alone together so an idea may be that you have a date night once a week or a fortnight. This is a night where it is just the two of you and all talk of kids, mortgage, debts etc is banned. This would be your time as a couple to try to relight the forces of attraction that brought you together in the first place.
You will probably find that both of you are finding the same issues difficult. You both probably miss spending quality time together and you may both be under financial and emotional pressure. Sometimes life gets in the way and we often expect our partners to become mind readers and be able to see a problem without us saying anything. We don’t tend to make time in our lives to really talk to our spouse. It is never too late to start.
Now when you are asked how to go get an ex back, you will be able to say that communication and quality time together are the keys to lifelong happiness.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
Should I Get Back Together With My Ex Boyfriend
If you read any agony aunt columns you will often see a letter titled "should I get back together with my ex boyfriend". The answer is always; "It depends!".
It depends on your age, how long you were together, why you broke up and ultimately what both of you want.
What does age have to do with it? Some people met their first love in their early teens and become convinced that this is the only person in the world that matters. For some it works out really well and years later they are celebrating their Golden Jubilee. But for most of us, our passionate youthful infatuations are not real love and we go on to meet our true soul mates. So if you are very young and have just split up with your first boyfriend, you should probably try dating some other boys first to see whether Mr Ex is in fact Mr Right as opposed to Mr Right now. If you have dated a load of men and this man is your ideal mate, then you should make every effort to get back together with him.
How long you were together will also play a part in whether you should make up or not. A couple who have been together a couple of weeks do not know each other that well despite what they may think. The sexual attraction between couples in the early stages of a romance can often blind you to the fact that your partner is not a candidate for a lifelong happy relationship. Emotions run very high in the early days and you could find yourself splitting up on a weekly basis. If this is the case, it is often a sign that there is no future for you at this point in time.
If you have been together for years, you may have split up because you have taken each other for granted. Couples drift apart as life gets in the way. You often find that you spend more quality time with your neighbors and friends than you do with your significant other. Illness, stress and financial worries can also play a part. If you have been together forever and have suddenly split up, then you should make every effort to sit down and discuss your relationship to see is it worth saving. Sometimes, sadly it isn't but at least you will know that you have made every effort.
Why you broke up will partly determine whether you should get back together or not. If you and you ex boyfriend have split because of a silly misunderstanding then you should try getting back together. It is pointless letting your pride stop you from saying sorry if you acted childishly. If on the other hand you have split up due to lies, deceit, fraud or an affair, the decision to get back together is a lot more difficult.
Ultimately it depends on what both of you want. You cannot force someone else to love you even if you do resort to emotional blackmail. Saying I want to get back together with my ex boyfriend is easily achievable if he also wants this to happen.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
It depends on your age, how long you were together, why you broke up and ultimately what both of you want.
What does age have to do with it? Some people met their first love in their early teens and become convinced that this is the only person in the world that matters. For some it works out really well and years later they are celebrating their Golden Jubilee. But for most of us, our passionate youthful infatuations are not real love and we go on to meet our true soul mates. So if you are very young and have just split up with your first boyfriend, you should probably try dating some other boys first to see whether Mr Ex is in fact Mr Right as opposed to Mr Right now. If you have dated a load of men and this man is your ideal mate, then you should make every effort to get back together with him.
How long you were together will also play a part in whether you should make up or not. A couple who have been together a couple of weeks do not know each other that well despite what they may think. The sexual attraction between couples in the early stages of a romance can often blind you to the fact that your partner is not a candidate for a lifelong happy relationship. Emotions run very high in the early days and you could find yourself splitting up on a weekly basis. If this is the case, it is often a sign that there is no future for you at this point in time.
If you have been together for years, you may have split up because you have taken each other for granted. Couples drift apart as life gets in the way. You often find that you spend more quality time with your neighbors and friends than you do with your significant other. Illness, stress and financial worries can also play a part. If you have been together forever and have suddenly split up, then you should make every effort to sit down and discuss your relationship to see is it worth saving. Sometimes, sadly it isn't but at least you will know that you have made every effort.
Why you broke up will partly determine whether you should get back together or not. If you and you ex boyfriend have split because of a silly misunderstanding then you should try getting back together. It is pointless letting your pride stop you from saying sorry if you acted childishly. If on the other hand you have split up due to lies, deceit, fraud or an affair, the decision to get back together is a lot more difficult.
Ultimately it depends on what both of you want. You cannot force someone else to love you even if you do resort to emotional blackmail. Saying I want to get back together with my ex boyfriend is easily achievable if he also wants this to happen.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
How Do I Get Back Together With My Ex Girlfriend?
This is the question my husband’s brother asked me the other day. Why did you break up was my response when really what I wanted to ask was how could you be such a donut to dump her?
He looked a bit sheepish and told me that he had met this girl at work and she smiled at him. Seemingly she is young, very pretty and looks rather like she belongs in Baywatch. So he, being a he-man type, decided that he had to dump his lovely girlfriend to date this beach babe. Needless to say, he soon found out that she had been smiling at his mate and looked on him like he was something on her shoe.
Well he deserved that but I believe he had ditched his girlfriend for a less obvious reason. He loves her and was scared of making a commitment to her. He had started thinking about settling down and having kids and nobody had made him feel this way before. But he was worried that being a career girl, this was not the future she had planned.
Unfortunately he is not very good at expressing his feelings so decided that it was better to finish the relationship rather than try to find out if his partner shared his vision of the future. D'oh!
Honestly, how can someone so intelligent on a professional level be so emotionally backward. Anyhow his ex partner is a lovely lady who, God love her, adores him so I knew that getting back with his ex girlfriend was possible. It was also a great idea as despite his obvious faults, they make a great couple and he does love her.
So I told him to write her a letter. He decided an email would do but I insisted it had to be a letter. A hand written letter is such an old fashioned way of courting someone that it almost always guarantees a positive response. So off he went to buy some paper and a pen and as I thought complete the task at hand.
And then he was back. “But what do I write?” He asked. Seriously he would have let me write the whole thing for him. So I told him to tell her how he felt. An MBA from Harvard and he is looking at me like I advised him to pull out his finger nails. I said “Tell her you love her and that you are very sorry for the way you behaved and that you would like to take her out this Friday to her favorite restaurant”.
Believe me that this approach works much better than a text, a bunch of roses and a takeaway. Thankfully his partner knows him well and saw the funny side, and my brother in law is no longer asking "how to get back together with my ex-girlfriend".
His new question is what to say to his future father in law when he pops the question but I will leave my hubby to deal with that one!
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
He looked a bit sheepish and told me that he had met this girl at work and she smiled at him. Seemingly she is young, very pretty and looks rather like she belongs in Baywatch. So he, being a he-man type, decided that he had to dump his lovely girlfriend to date this beach babe. Needless to say, he soon found out that she had been smiling at his mate and looked on him like he was something on her shoe.
Well he deserved that but I believe he had ditched his girlfriend for a less obvious reason. He loves her and was scared of making a commitment to her. He had started thinking about settling down and having kids and nobody had made him feel this way before. But he was worried that being a career girl, this was not the future she had planned.
Unfortunately he is not very good at expressing his feelings so decided that it was better to finish the relationship rather than try to find out if his partner shared his vision of the future. D'oh!
Honestly, how can someone so intelligent on a professional level be so emotionally backward. Anyhow his ex partner is a lovely lady who, God love her, adores him so I knew that getting back with his ex girlfriend was possible. It was also a great idea as despite his obvious faults, they make a great couple and he does love her.
So I told him to write her a letter. He decided an email would do but I insisted it had to be a letter. A hand written letter is such an old fashioned way of courting someone that it almost always guarantees a positive response. So off he went to buy some paper and a pen and as I thought complete the task at hand.
And then he was back. “But what do I write?” He asked. Seriously he would have let me write the whole thing for him. So I told him to tell her how he felt. An MBA from Harvard and he is looking at me like I advised him to pull out his finger nails. I said “Tell her you love her and that you are very sorry for the way you behaved and that you would like to take her out this Friday to her favorite restaurant”.
Believe me that this approach works much better than a text, a bunch of roses and a takeaway. Thankfully his partner knows him well and saw the funny side, and my brother in law is no longer asking "how to get back together with my ex-girlfriend".
His new question is what to say to his future father in law when he pops the question but I will leave my hubby to deal with that one!
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
How To Keep A Woman Happy
So you want to know how to keep a woman happy? It is not easy to do but once you master it, you will win the heart of your woman forever. So it is worth a try right?
A Woman sometimes just needs to talk. Men are programmed to find solutions to every problem but sometimes we just want you to listen to us. We don't want you to look after us or solve every issue we raise but just to listen.
Yes I know she can spend two hours on the phone to a friend that she is meeting that afternoon anyway. It goes back to the days of cavemen. Whilst the men were out hunting, the women were at home where their ability to bond with others was directly proportionate to their chances of survival. They depended on the other women to look after them and their families should they fall sick. Childbirth in those days often resulted in a death sentence for these women.
Women like to go to the toilets in twos and threes. It is just a girl thing and the sooner you come to accept it the better. Don't get paranoid, we are not going to discuss you in detail - that will happen tomorrow.
Buy your lady flowers. But rather than buying her a bunch of roses, send her one of her favorite flowers every so often. This way she will know that you are thinking of her rather than just making a grand gesture.
Little things mean a lot to most women. So regardless of the fact that you are working 60 plus hours per week to pay your mortgage or put the kids through school, always find time to ring her at least twice a day. Ring to say that you miss her and then ring her back later on to tell her what time you expect to be home.
Say thank you when she does something ordinary. Everyone including women like to be appreciated so if you come home and it is obvious she has cleaned the bathroom, notice it and make an effort to keep it clean. That means helping your towel to find its way off the bathroom floor.
If your woman has had a hard day at the office, run her a hot bath and hand her a glass of chilled wine whilst you put the kids to bed and prepare dinner. Don’t ruin it by expecting sexual favors in return. In a recent survey, when women were asked what would make them happy, one of the most common answers was to be kissed without being groped!
Surprise her with a note under her pillow telling her how much you love her or appreciate her. Okay she will probably assume you have done something wrong and wonder if you are feeling guilty but underneath she will be pleased.
Making a woman happy involves doing the little things in life just that little bit more.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
A Woman sometimes just needs to talk. Men are programmed to find solutions to every problem but sometimes we just want you to listen to us. We don't want you to look after us or solve every issue we raise but just to listen.
Yes I know she can spend two hours on the phone to a friend that she is meeting that afternoon anyway. It goes back to the days of cavemen. Whilst the men were out hunting, the women were at home where their ability to bond with others was directly proportionate to their chances of survival. They depended on the other women to look after them and their families should they fall sick. Childbirth in those days often resulted in a death sentence for these women.
Women like to go to the toilets in twos and threes. It is just a girl thing and the sooner you come to accept it the better. Don't get paranoid, we are not going to discuss you in detail - that will happen tomorrow.
Buy your lady flowers. But rather than buying her a bunch of roses, send her one of her favorite flowers every so often. This way she will know that you are thinking of her rather than just making a grand gesture.
Little things mean a lot to most women. So regardless of the fact that you are working 60 plus hours per week to pay your mortgage or put the kids through school, always find time to ring her at least twice a day. Ring to say that you miss her and then ring her back later on to tell her what time you expect to be home.
Say thank you when she does something ordinary. Everyone including women like to be appreciated so if you come home and it is obvious she has cleaned the bathroom, notice it and make an effort to keep it clean. That means helping your towel to find its way off the bathroom floor.
If your woman has had a hard day at the office, run her a hot bath and hand her a glass of chilled wine whilst you put the kids to bed and prepare dinner. Don’t ruin it by expecting sexual favors in return. In a recent survey, when women were asked what would make them happy, one of the most common answers was to be kissed without being groped!
Surprise her with a note under her pillow telling her how much you love her or appreciate her. Okay she will probably assume you have done something wrong and wonder if you are feeling guilty but underneath she will be pleased.
Making a woman happy involves doing the little things in life just that little bit more.
For more information on accomplishing this goal, check out "The Magic Of Making Up". And you know what, it worked like magic for us. Now we are more in love than ever.
Get Back At Your Ex. Why Would You Bother?
A lot of people, women in particular it has to be said, appear to spend hours thinking of ways to answer the question of how to get back at your ex? My view on this is why bother? The only person you will end up hurting is yourself. Anger and regret are negative emotions and do not have any long term value to add to your life.
Couples split up for all sorts of reasons but I firmly believe that it takes two to tango. Yes, he may have had an affair or she may have a drink problem but at the end of the day it is usually too simple to lay the blame for the break up at one person's feet.
But when a relationship ends it should be final unless both of you decide that you wish to get back together. Otherwise, move on. Don't waste your time or energy trying to think of ways to destroy his life or pick fights with her new man.
Every man or woman over the age of 21 has been dumped at some point in their lives. If they say they haven’t, they are probably lying. Breaking up can be extremely painful - you only have to see how many films and songs are written on the subject. Even classic books involve painful relationships - have you read Jane Eyre lately?
Relationships of all types make the world go round and it would be a very boring place if we were happy all of the time. Stories such as Cinderella and sleeping Beauty end when the couple kiss and we all believe they will live happily ever after. Cinders and Beauty have found their Mr Right, but what they don't know is that his first name is always!
Life is too short to live it out with a grudge against someone else. The only person that will suffer will be you and those that love you. Your ex will be long gone - do you really think that they give you more than a fleeting thought. They didn't care enough about you to stay together so why would they care now?
There are plenty of lovely people for you to date and perhaps fall in love with. But you will never find a fulfilling new relationship if your life is consumed by hatred for someone else. Being on your own for the first time in a long time can be tough but it can also be liberating. Think positively - you now have the chance to do all the things you wanted to do but your partner wasn’t interested in.
Make a list of twenty things you have to be thankful for and read this every night before you fall asleep. Add five things to your list every day and you will soon find yourself enjoying life so much that you won’t have time to worry about how to get back at your ex. It will be more like ex who?
Couples split up for all sorts of reasons but I firmly believe that it takes two to tango. Yes, he may have had an affair or she may have a drink problem but at the end of the day it is usually too simple to lay the blame for the break up at one person's feet.
But when a relationship ends it should be final unless both of you decide that you wish to get back together. Otherwise, move on. Don't waste your time or energy trying to think of ways to destroy his life or pick fights with her new man.
Every man or woman over the age of 21 has been dumped at some point in their lives. If they say they haven’t, they are probably lying. Breaking up can be extremely painful - you only have to see how many films and songs are written on the subject. Even classic books involve painful relationships - have you read Jane Eyre lately?
Relationships of all types make the world go round and it would be a very boring place if we were happy all of the time. Stories such as Cinderella and sleeping Beauty end when the couple kiss and we all believe they will live happily ever after. Cinders and Beauty have found their Mr Right, but what they don't know is that his first name is always!
Life is too short to live it out with a grudge against someone else. The only person that will suffer will be you and those that love you. Your ex will be long gone - do you really think that they give you more than a fleeting thought. They didn't care enough about you to stay together so why would they care now?
There are plenty of lovely people for you to date and perhaps fall in love with. But you will never find a fulfilling new relationship if your life is consumed by hatred for someone else. Being on your own for the first time in a long time can be tough but it can also be liberating. Think positively - you now have the chance to do all the things you wanted to do but your partner wasn’t interested in.
Make a list of twenty things you have to be thankful for and read this every night before you fall asleep. Add five things to your list every day and you will soon find yourself enjoying life so much that you won’t have time to worry about how to get back at your ex. It will be more like ex who?
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